初中英语话剧剧本

搞笑英语话剧剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》搞笑5人剧本《西门吹雪与叶孤城》演员表：西门吹雪叶孤城花满楼king旁白道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠旁白：A quiet village is covered with white snow .Bird sare dancing in the cold .Aman is walking along the street ,step by step .Wind is coming in silence.Another mysterious man approaches .Y与X相遇．X：oH ,I am sorry to knock you !Y:Haha, Never mind bay bay.X:Excuseme， who are you on earth? could you tell me your name?Y:ha ha ,I won’t change my name no matter what happens. I’m the most famous——-YeGucheng. Who are you?X:I am xi men chui xue.Y惊讶:Ar, xi men chui xue?X:Yes,what is wrong?Y:I heard that you are the besting Martial Arts?X:Great, you know me !Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’t kill me! let me go!X:No, I must kill you !Y:I don't want to be killed.There are eighty-year-old mother and a three-year old son to belooked after by me!X:No way! Because we are fighting now!you know?Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don't force me!X:Pardon!(Y拿出一袋牛奶)X抢过牛奶:milk, very good! I like drinking it. how do you know that?Y:please drink it!X喝完牛奶:Thanks, ha,haY:Do you still want to kill me?X:Sure, must! milk is milk.Y(恼怒+冷酷):Very good! very good! I hope you will not forget what you said!?X:I’m sure I won’t!Y:I must give you a lesson! If I don't beat you this time, you’ll never behave properly! 3-2-1-0!X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !Y大笑：HaHa……X可怜状: help! help! Where is the washroom?Y:What ?X:Toliet?Y:What ?X:The “WC”?Y:Oh,I see ,go along this street andturn right when you see acorssing road!X:Thanks,byebye.Y掏出纸屑吹:This is genuirne snow!H:Stop!Protecting the environment is abasicobligation!Y:Who are you?H:Hua—man—-lou! Have you seen xi men chui xue?Y:Yes, he was beaten by me and is in“WC” now,ha……H惊讶:Now you are the best in the world!Y:You are right!H:Teriffic! yo uare the one my king looking for! do you want join in us?Y:Yes,It’s very good.H:Ok, follow me, Let’s go to see my king!Y:Ok,Let’s go!第二幕：无间道H:My honest ! let me introduce yegucheng to you! （指Y） this is yegucheng.K:sit down plese, yegucheng.H走到Y前，《婚礼进行曲》起，H神甫状:Yegucheng! Do you want to follow my king no matter what happens such as cold,headache,sair and aids?Y: Yes,I do.K: Hua man lou, come . put the ring on his finger!（音乐停）X唱着上:Only you……(看到戒子) this ring should be mine!K:But who are you? why should it belong to you?Y急切: king! dear king!I must go now,my brother is looking for me!huoxi(维语再见) K:huoxi? What does that mean? It is not English, isn’t it ?Y:How clever……X冷酷:yegucheng! come here!I want to tell you some thing!Y抱X的腿:old brother ! Forgive me!X:Forgive me? Why?Y: Once there was a change before me,I lost it. Ifthe god give me a chance, I’ll tell you“I love you”,If there must be a limited period,I hope it is thousand year!X:You shall cheat me!all you did are wrong!how can youtell thelady’s“WC”!Y:Ilikegoinglady’s WC .I……I……IthinkthatyoulikewhatIlike.(Y又拿出一袋牛奶)X: m-i-l-k?haha, ayixidailu!(我爱你的意思)K: ayixidailu?What’sthemeaning? whyIalsocan’tunderstandyou?X:Youarestupid! Itmeans“I love you”.K:Don’t saythat“you love me”. I’llkillyouforyousayingdirtywordtome!X:What? (侧耳装着听不到) You—kill—-me?come, come…(X上去抓住K)K:Fuckyou. Imustkillyou!X:Howcanyoukillme? haha……Y:Letmehaveatry! 3-2-1-0(X捂着肚子，蹲下)K: thankyouverymuch, yousaveme. Now, I’llgiveyoutheticketforAmericantoletyouhaveavacation.Y:That’s good. butthereisonemorething. canyougivemea MM ?IwanttogoAmericanwithher.K:ofcouse.Youaretheonewhohasthesimilartastewithme! Hahaha……Y:Hahaha—–H:Where’ssomewhere?K:What?Y:Doyouwanttogolady’s“WC”?X:Yes,I……I…… do.H顶着摇头：X,no, no， youcan’tgotoLady’s “WC”. Thatisnottheplacewhereyoucangointo ! becauseyouareX ! youarethe bestmanofChinesekongfu!X: whatifI’mthebestintheword? !whyItrymybesttolivebutI’mstillsomiserable ? whencanIgetmyfreedom? mustbethedeadday ? !K: youareright. onewillnotbecleveruntilthedayhedie. Inthatcase ,whywill you die in such a bad sorrow way !gointo theLady’s WC , thendie , comfortablly ! goahead !H: you , stupid , bad behavior ! goaway !K; why ? whydoyouhelphim ! whoacturallyareyou ?H: myreal name isLuXiaofeng——the wifeofX .I’maspy.K惊讶: !you—you—YouareLuXiaofeng ? X’wife ?Y: Ihavealreadyrecognizedyou . atricker ! doyouknow, youarethefirst person who cheated me ! because of you ,Ideeide never believe anyone else ,including myself .you have destroyed my looking for you for many years ,just for today ! (轻声说)Xwilldie ,goandseehim ,please .H扑倒在X的身边：X,do’t die ,you should be alive ,there are much hope inthe fature and tomorrow is a goodbeginning !K:what amoving story !I was impressed !Y:life is a progress ,but it is depressed that it can not resume !H: life isa progress ,and it is delight that itneedn’t resume !(H忽然将一把匕首插进Y的心脏，K吓跑.音乐《再见，警察》起)Y痛苦状:don’tleave me here , you know I love you and I have nothing except you now ,please notabandon me !realizethat I’m wrong .help me,I intend to be back ,helpme ,I keyyou ,beg you——help me . I’ll never dothat again !(Y死，音乐停)（X咳，H扑到身边，电影《我的父亲母亲》原声音乐起）H: X , oh , no ,you can’t die ,we will go home together .X:gohome ! ?H:Tomorrow is another day !evenyou have thelast secondto live,youshould be alive ,not only for me , but for ourlove !X:doyouwant melivealifeinsuchasorrow way ? ok , ok , Ipromise I willbealive for you .but !youknow, Ihavenot timeleft ,but you have ,promisethatyou will be happy everyday !Youmustdome this honor… promise meyou will survive… that youwillnevergiveup… nomatter what happens… no matter howhopeless… promise me now ,andnever let go of that promise.H: I promise .X:Never let go .H:Ipromise . Iwill never let go ,X.I””””ll never letgo.(X死)H:be alive !yeah , bealive ! bealivewithout ahendance !lifecanbechanceliketimecangotoback . thereisbeatifulsnowbutinsping , solifecancomefromthebeginning ! （H自刎，艰难的爬到X身边死.音乐停。）

The Gifts （礼物）－英语剧本Mon.：Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents . They have only 20 dollars a week, it doesn’t leave much for saving.In fact, Della and Jim have two possessions in which they both take very great pride. One is Jim’s gold watch, which has been his father’s and his grandfather’s. The other is Della’s long beautiful hair.D: Life is so hard for me. Though I saved the money for many months , I still have only one dollar and eighty seven cents.D: I---- I---- I have to have my hair cut and sold it . In that way I can get some money and I can buy a beautiful present for Jim.(At the shop—“Madame Sofronie. We Buy Hair Goods of All Kinds”)D: Will you buy my hair?M: Yes, I buy all kinds of hair. Sit down, please. Take your hat off and let me have a look. Oh, very beautiful. Very good! Twenty dollars , OK?D: All right. But please give it to me quickly.M: Here you are. Twenty dollars.D: Thank you. Bye.M: Bye.Mon.：Della spent two hours in the streets. Then she stopped at a Gold Shop and bought a gold watch chain. Now ,Della is at home.D: Oh, what a beautiful gold watch chain. I think it must match Jim's watch. When he sees it he must be very happy .(Suddenly the door opened and in came Jim . )J: You-----?D: Jim. Don’t look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold it because I couldn’t have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. Jim, it will grow quickly. You don’t mind, do you ? I just had to do it. My hair grows very fast, you know. Say “Merry Christmas!” Jim, and let’s be happy.J: You’ve cut off your hair?D: I’ve cut it off and sold it. It’s sold. I tell you -sold and gone, too. It’s Christmas Eve , Jim. Be good to me, for it went for you.J: Well , Della. Don’t make any mistake about me. I don’t think there’s anything about a hair cut that could make me love you any less. I know, it went for me. Look at this package .D: What ?J: Look at it yourself. You 'll see.D:Ah! The combs. They were in the shop windows for many months!J:Yes, the beautiful combs, pure tortoiseshell, with jewelry rims--just the color to wear in your beautiful, hair.D: But , Jim. They are expensive combs. I know, my heart had longed for them without the least hope of possession. Now they are mine. Thank you Jim.J; Now, you will see why I was upset at first.D: Jim, you don’t know what a nice –what a beautiful , nice gift I’ve got for you. Can you guess?J: I'm sorry. I won't guess.D: Look. A gold watch chain. Isn’t it lovely ,Jim? I hunted all over the town to find it. You’ll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it .J: Della, Let’s put our Christmas gifts away and keep them a while. They’re too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money. And I bought the combs. Now, Let’s have our supper.翻译如下：礼 物旁白：明天是圣诞节，但是德拉觉得很难过，因为她无钱为她丈夫吉姆买一圣诞礼物，她只有1.87美元，他们一个月只有20美元的收入，那很难再从中省钱了。事实上，德拉和吉姆有两件让他们引以为豪的宝贝，一件是吉姆的金表，那是从他祖父和父亲那里留传下来的，还有一件是德拉那一头棕发，又长又美丽。德拉：生活对我来说很困难，虽然我很多个月以前就开始存钱了，我仍然只有1.87美元。德拉：我……我……我不得不剪了头发去卖掉，那样我就能得到一些钱去买礼物给吉姆了。（在店门口，写着“夫人：我们买各种各样的头发”）德拉：你买我的头发吗？夫人：是的，我们买各式的头发，把你的帽子脱下来，让我看一下你的头发。哦，很美的头发，很好的发质，20美元，行不行？德拉：好的，但是请你快点把钱给我。夫人：给你，20美元。德拉：谢谢你，再见。夫人：再见。旁白：德拉在街上逛了2个小时，然后她在一家金店止步，进去买了一条金表链。现在德拉正在家里。德拉：哦，多么漂亮的金链子，我想那一定跟吉姆的手表很配，当他看到它的时候，一定会很高兴的。（突然门打开了，吉姆走了进来）吉姆：你……？德拉：吉姆，不要那样看着我，我剪了我的头发并卖了，因为我无法度过一个我不送你圣诞节礼物的圣诞节，吉姆，它会长得很快的，你不会介意的，是不是？我必须这么做，我的头发长得很快的，这你是知道的，说：“圣诞快乐！”，吉姆，让我们高兴起来。吉姆：你剪了你的头发？德拉：我剪了头发并卖了，它被卖掉了，我跟你说它被卖掉了，没有了！现在是圣诞节前夜，对我好一点，吉姆，那都是为了你。吉姆：哦，德拉，别误会我，我想我不会因为你剪了头发而对你的爱就减少了，我知道，那是为了我，看看这个包裹。德拉：什么？吉姆：你自己看吧！你会明白的。德拉：啊，是梳子！它们就是几个月前陈列在橱窗里的那套。吉姆：是的，那套漂亮的梳子，镶珠宝的，那颜色正好配你的发色。德拉：但是，吉姆，那些都是很贵的，我知道，我一直渴望但却没有丝毫的奢望拥有它。现在，它们是我的了，谢谢你，吉姆。吉姆：现在，你知道我为什么一开始就那么悲伤了吧。德拉：吉姆，我给你买了一件又美丽又好的礼物，你能猜出来吗？吉姆：对不起，我不想猜。德拉：看，一条金表链，吉姆，它是不是很可爱？我找遍了整个城才找的，你从现在起可得一天要看一百次时间了。把你的表给我，我想看一下表链装在表上的样子。吉姆：德拉，让我们把圣诞礼物收起来珍藏一段时间，它们太好了，但我们现在用不着，我把表卖了。得到了钱才买了这梳子。现在让我们吃晚饭吧！祝你好运！希望对你有帮助！

英语幽默短剧剧本The Pocket Money Scene1（At Salesman’s home） N: In a dark dirty house, there lived a small, dirty salesman. He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students. He has a lot of money now. But how does he make the candies? Oh, xu …… He is coming! S: Hello, do you know me? No? Oh, let me tell you .I’m the famous candy salesman at the school gate. My candies are very popular,(展示)，I don’t know why. The foolish students always come here. I’ll be a boss soon! Candy, money, candy, money…… Oops! It’s time to make candies now.(看表) First, put the flour on the table. Then, water, sugar, flour.(边说边做) Now press, press…… Oh, my dirty hands! Never mind! Just do it!(满不在意的神情) Press, press…… Oh, my god!Never mind! Just do it! Press, press, the children will not know it , it’s OK,hehehe…… Now let me cut it into pieces!

初中英语搞笑话剧剧本

话剧主要叙述手段为演员在台上无伴奏的对白或独白，但可以使用少量音乐、歌唱等。以下是初中英语搞笑话剧剧本，欢迎阅读。

第一幕 开场白

旁白：Long long ago there lived a beautiful princess, and there is a big family. But the hostess died. Her son is handsome and goodness. Her husband married another wife. The stepmother is very cruel to the son. One day their King will hold a ball and choose a prince for his daughter.

B: Girls in the other side look at me, look at me, look at me …I am David, handsome and cool. I try my best to loose my weight for this ball. This is my photo three days ago.

C: I am rich and humor. Look at my snow-white teeth, because I use the famous toothpaste---Peer.

A: Oh, Can I go to the ball?

B and C: No!

B: Look at yourself. The clothes are so bad and dirty.

C: Yes, yes.

B: Your hair …（用手拨几下）

C: What a mass!

B: Your face

C: Black and dirty, you seemed like a frog.（B拿出青蛙的.照片）

B: How can you go to meet the beautiful princess?

Stepmother: OK, children, let’s go!

C: Mum, what about him?

Stepmother: You, just stay at home to do some housework.

A: But, Mum, I want to go there.

Stepmother: Oh, OK.

B and C: Mum, why do you take him? Don’t you think he will loose our face?

Finally, they go without A.

第二幕 仙女下凡

A: Why Why Why I can’t go to join that ball.

旁白： At this time a beautiful fairy appear.

Fairy: Ahh, my poor child! What things make you so sad?

A: The beautiful princess will held a ball, but my stepmother and my brothers don’t let me go there.

Fairy: My good boy, let me help you. (拿出一套礼服)

A:（喜出望外，准备去参加舞会。）

Fairy: Wait for a moment. Don’t forget your shoes.（拿出一双耐克鞋）

A: Thank you, my respectful fairy.

第三幕 一见钟情

旁白：A is wearing beautiful clothes going to the palace as quickly as possible, but his brother and stepmother have already arrived.

门卫：The next, the Trade’s first son.

B: Oh, beautiful princess. I have greatly admired you for a long time, and you are like a Pizza in my heart.

Princess: Please wait for a moment, what talent and skill you have?

B: I’ll sing a song for you. (Singing) Only you

Princess: Pass.

门卫：The next. The Trade’s second son.

C: La la I am a

Princess: Pass.

旁白：At that time A was appearing on the front door of the palace. All the people were shocked by his handsome and demeanor.

A: Beautiful princess. Can I sing a song for you?

Princess: Sure, please.

A: （扶着公主从宝座上走下，两人目光对视，走成一个圈，开始唱歌）。

旁白：All the people seem to disappear. Only A is left in the princess’s eyes. And so is the princess. Dang dang dang the clock strikes 12. A is waken from the happiness.

A: Princess, I must go now. I am very sorry.

Princess: Wait

旁白：In a hurry A dropped one of his shoes. But the princess was following him.

A: (A look at princess and that shoe he has to go into the forest.)

第四幕 丢失的鞋

旁白：The next morning, the guard brings the shoe to the princess.

侍卫：My princess, this is the shoe left by Yang Master yesterday.

Princess: That’s great! God save me! Go and declare: Whoever can wear this shoe will be my prince.

第五幕 结局

旁白：The guars declared this thing in the whole city and it caused a big sensation. The two prince of the Trade are more excited.

B: Oh, it’s so beautiful. I’m sure I can wear this shoe.

C: Do you think it is possible? Only I can wear that shoe.

Stepmother: Stop talking, my dear sons. Go to get ready for it quickly. The guards will come in no time.

旁白：A was sweeping floor more and more slowly. The guards came in.

侍卫：This is the shoe. Come and try it.

旁白：At this moment B caught it quickly, tried it and murmured.

B: why can’t I put it on?

Stepmother: My dear, let me help you.

旁白：The mother pulled B to the corner cutting his toe. Then B put the shoe very hardly.

B: My princess, let’s go.（一瘸一拐）

Princess: No, you are not my prince. Take off the shoe.

C: Let me try. Let me try. (murmuring)I cannot wear it either.

旁白：The mother pulled C to the corner again, and cut his heel.

C: My princess, let’s go.

Princess: No, you are not my prince, either. （一瘸一拐）

侍卫：Who else doesn’t try to put on the shoe here?

A: (In a low voice) Let me have a try.(A put the shoe without any difficulty. It just fit him. And A took off his dirty clothes again.)

Princess: Wow, you are my prince.

Princess and Prince got married. Then they live together and they are very happy.