复古猫小懒
A Pleasant SurpriseA friend of mine had been wanting new kitchen cabinets for a long time, but her husband insisted they were an extravagance. She went to visit her mother for two weeks, and when she returned, she was overjoyed to find that beautiful new cabinets had been installed.A few days later a neighbor came over to visit my friend. After admiring the new cabinets, the neighbor added, "All of us were so glad that the fire your husband had while you were gone was confined to the kitchen. "我朋友有很长一段时间一直想在厨房添置一些厨柜，但她丈夫坚持说这是铺张浪费。她去娘家过了两周，回到家来，发现厨房里新添置了漂亮的厨柜，这令她喜出望外。几天后，邻居来拜访我朋友。欣赏了新厨柜后，邻居说：“你不在家的时候，你丈夫弄失了火。我们都深感庆幸只是厨房遭了殃。”
老太婆心态好
Nick is sick. Nick is too sick to play ball.I miss my pal, says Nick.I kiss my pal, says Bill.I have a gift for Nick.It is a ship.This is a good gift.Now can I see Nick?No, Nick is sick, says Dad.I have a gift for Nick.It is a fish.This is a good gift.Can I see Nick?No, Nick is still sick, says Dad.I have a gift for Nick.Nick will like this gift.This is the best gift. 音频怎么上传呢
尛小尛111
Monkey and a Tiger Today I am very happy to stand here, telling you a story:A Monkey and a tiger .Every one thinks the monkey is very small, but the tiger is strong.In this story Little Monkey uses his wisdow to bit the tiger. just remenber those who are weak can beat those who are strong. let's share the story. An old tiger lives in the forest. He does not want to look for food . He often tells other animals to bring him something to eat. One day He sees a monkey and says," I'm hungry, monkey. Go to the village and bring me a fat pig.""Oh, Tiger," says the monkey. "I can't do that now. There is another tiger over there. He also wants a fat pig. He will not let me get anything for you to eat. I am afraid of him.""What?" cries the tiger. "Show me that tiger. I will teach him a lesson .""Come with me," says the monkey.The monkey and the tiger get to a bridge over the river. "Now look down at the water," says the monkey."Do you see the head, the white teeth and the big green eyes of a tiger?""Yes, I do," says the old tiger," I will eat him up!" “Grr…! So you told Monkey not to bring me anything?!Grrr … I’ll kill you!”With these words the tiger jumped into the river. He did not come out again. “Ha,ha, ha! Goodbye, Mr Tiger,” said the monkey and he went away .
思美味520
冷笑话是近几年才出现的新兴语言现象，它以网络为主要的传播方式。我精心收集了关于短篇美式英语小笑话，供大家欣赏学习!关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇1 For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an allergy togold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I heldmy hands up and said, "Well, you'll notice that my hands are bare." Later that evening I openedmy present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair ofgardening gloves. 几个月以来，我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的结婚戒指，因为我对黄金有点过敏。生日那天，我正在干园艺活时，丈夫问我想要什么礼物。我举起双手说：“嗯，你肯定看到了，我的两手都是光光的。” 那天晚上，我满怀热情地拆开了丈夫送的礼物。“生日快乐!”他说。我打开一看：里面包着一双园艺手套。 关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇2 One day a ten-year-old child asked his mother, "Mom, what is a synonym?" "What? You evendon't know what a synonym is? How foolish you are. When I describe you as foolish, I meanyou're silly, stupid. Now you know what a synonym is ?" "Yes, a synonym is using badlanguage." The child concluded. 一天， 一个10岁的孩子问母亲："妈，什么是 同义词 ?" "你说什么?竟然连同义词都不懂!真是个笨蛋。我说你是个笨蛋，就是说你是个傻瓜，是个蠢货。你现在明白同义词的意思了吗?" "明白了。同义词就是骂人。" 关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇3 Mother asked her little boy, "Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?" "Nothing, Mum,"answered the son proundly, "instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told herthree." 母亲问她年幼的儿子：“宝贝，今天老师教了你些什么?” 儿子骄傲地说：“什么都没教，妈妈。她反倒问我一加二等于几，我告诉她等于三。” 关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇4 A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. "Well, sit down and eat your tea," said hismother. "Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got somethingin it." Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache. "That'sbecause it's empty," said his bright son. "You'd be all right if you had something in it." 一个男孩放学回家时，觉得肚子痛。“来，坐下，吃点点心，”妈妈说，“你肚子痛是因为肚子是空的。吃点东西就会好的。” 一会儿，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，说是头痛。 “你头痛是因为你的脑袋是空的，”他那聪明的儿子说，“里面装点东西，就会好的。” 关于短篇美式英语小笑话篇5 One night a hotel caught fire， and the people who were staying in it ran out in their nightclothes.Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.“Before I came out,”said one，“I ran intosome of the rooms and found a lot of money.People don't think of money when they're afraid.When anyone leaves paper money in a fire，the fire burns it.So I took all the bills that I couldfind.No one will be poorer because I took them.” “You don't know my work，” said theother.“What is your work?”“I'm a policeman.“Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quicklyand said，“And do you know my work?”“No,”said the policeman.“I'm a writer. I'm alwaystelling stories about things that never happened.” 一天晚上，一家旅馆失火，住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡 衣就跑了出来。两个人站在外面，看着大火。“在我出来之前，”其中一个说：“我跑进一些房间，找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里，火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。” “你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个说。“你是干什么的?” “我是警察。” “噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动，说：“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察说。“我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的 故事 。”
