xiaomakuaipao
一个国家总有些疯狂的人，试图以疯狂的方式展现疯狂的历史。荆轲即是一名非常有名的剑客，并被派遣去刺杀秦国的国君嬴政。但结果他失败了。你们想知道当时发生了什么吗？好吧，接下来的的表演将告诉你真相。情景一太子丹：镜子啊镜子，请你告诉我谁是这世上最英俊的男子呢？（是你啊，太子丹！）哦，谢谢你！镜子！大家好，我是太子丹，魔镜说过我是世上最迷人的男子。但嬴政是一个嫉妒心强的家伙，我凭直觉断定，如果魔镜告诉他真相的话，他将会杀了我。我是如此地恐惧，我该怎么办呢？我的丞相大人，你在哪啊？阿三：殿下，我来了。太子丹:我已经反复告诉你无数遍了，要称呼我为“我最漂亮的、优雅的、英俊的、迷人的、可爱的、聪明的、亲爱的太子丹殿下”。阿三：好吧，殿下，我有个好主意。我们可以找一位英雄去杀掉嬴政。太子丹：哦耶，在这个世纪最重要的物品是什么呢？人才！ 好主意！但谁才是最佳人选呢？阿三:经过一番筛选，我手头已有两名合适人选。一位是李莫愁小姐，另一位是荆轲先生，他们明天将会为争夺天下第一杀手而决斗。太子丹：好，那尽快将胜者名字报给我。阿三：是！情景二荆轲：你是李莫愁吗？李：正是！荆轲：好，我就是荆轲，你知道的，我将会让你明白我才是天下第一的杀手。李：你是在向我挑战吗？荆轲：当然！李：来吧！李：到底刚刚发生了什么?你为什么没受伤？李：母亲常对我说:"莫愁啊，生活就像巧克力盒，你永远无法预知你将要获得什么。“我终于体会到了，母亲是正确的。太子丹：你好吗？荆轲：很好，谢谢你！你怎么样呢？太子丹：哦，我的天哪！你能给我一个回答“你好吗”的有新意的答案吗？荆轲：当然可以！太子丹：你好吗？荆轲：我很好，谢谢你！你的夫人好吗？荆轲：嗨，先生，我只是在开玩笑而已。太子丹：哦，我也只是在开玩笑！我能要张你的名片吗！另外，有的地方表示敬称时最好将“你”换成“您”，我就不一个个换过来了，希望对你有帮助。
漫山红遍
作揖打恭make a bow with hands folded in front They make a slight bow with both hands clasped in front to express blessings.拜年时人们彼此作揖,就是双手抱拳放在胸前,表示祝福
俺是陆军PLA
country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众） I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister?阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！这句话要跟观众交流，最好由观众来回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate?阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK?阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK. I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁Are you challenging me?荆轲Off course! 耸耸肩表示同意李莫愁Come on!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。。。。”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person. Don't we? Do we? （赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）李莫愁：Momma always said: "Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you're gonna get." I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”?荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife?太子丹晕倒荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please?
