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英语短篇笑话
看英语笑话,开心学习英语!
1、
Mrs. Brown: Oh, my dear, I have lost my precious little dog!
Mrs. Smith: But you must put an advertisement in the papers!
Mrs. Brown: It's no use, my little dog can't read.
布朗夫人:哦,
亲爱的,我把珍爱的小狗给丢了!
史密斯夫人:可是你该在报纸上登广告啊!
布朗夫人:没有用的,我的小狗不认识字。”
2、
The six-year-old John was terribly spoiled. His father knew it, but his grandma doted on(溺爱,宠爱) him. He hardly left her side. And when he wanted anything, he either cried or threw a temper tantrum(乱发脾气) . Then came his first day of school, his first day away from his grandmother's loving arms.When he came home from school his grandma met him at the door. "Was school all right?" she asked, "Did you get along all right? Did you cry?""Cry?" John asked. "No, I didn't cry, but the teacher did!"
六岁的约翰娇生惯养。他的父亲知道这一点,可他的祖父母仍然宠着他。这孩子几乎寸步不离他的祖母。他想要什么不是哭,就是闹。他第一天上学才离开祖母的.怀抱。约翰放学了,他奶奶在门口接他并问道:“学校怎么样?你过的好吗?哭了没有?”“哭?”约翰问,“不,我没哭,可老师哭了。”
3、
The patient is adamant. "Doc, I need a liver transplant, a kidney transplant, a heart transplant, a cornea transplant, a spleen transplant, a pancreas trans. . ." "What makes you think you need all these?" Well, replied the patient, "My boss said if I wanted to keep my job I needed to get reorganized."
这个病人显得很坚决。“医生,我需要做肝脏移植、肾脏移植、心脏移植、角膜移植、脾脏移植、胰腺移植和……” “你为什么认为你需要做这么多移植手术?”病人回答:“哦,是这样,我的老板说如果我这个人不重新组装的话,就别想保住我的工作!”
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青蛙公主999
笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。我精心收集了最简短的英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!
嫩的稀奇!
Like most colleges,the food at St. Mary's College of Maryland scores low marks for both quality and variety.One exception is our annual steak-and-shrimp
night;but even this cari t escape the critics.
像很多大学一样,玛丽兰的圣·玛丽学院的伙食无论从花样上,还是从质量上评分都作低。咋一的例外是我们每年的牛排大虾之夜。但,即使是这天的食品,也很难逃脱评论
家的评论。我听到一个学生说:“这块牛排应烧得再嫩一点儿。”
"This steak could be a little more rare ," I overheard a fellow student say.
她的同伴说:“小声点儿,一年一次就够稀奇的了。(注:英语中,嫩和稀奇都是rare。)
"Pipe down,"whispered her companion. "Once a year is rare enough !”
经验
The manager of a fast-food franchise was approached by a teenager looking for a job. "Have you had any experience with fast food?"the manager asked.
一位少年来封一家快餐馆找工作,经理问他:“你有在快餐店工作的经脸吗7"
The young man paused for a moment.“Well,“he replied,”I've eaten a lot of it.”
年轻人想了想说:“这么说吧,我吃过很多次快餐。”
买书,但不用!
" This is the book recommended this quarter,”announced my political science professor on the first day of class. "However,we won't use it much, because my primary purpose is to teach you to think.”
“这段时间,我推荐你们用这本书。”政治经济学教授在我们的第一堂课上说。“可是,我们这本书用得不多。因为,我的主要目的是想教你们怎样思维。”
Angered that my hard-earned money had been wasted,I raised my hand,”You mean I just spent$22. 50 on a book I won't need?"
听到这儿我感到很气愤。难道我辛苦挣来的钱就这么浪费掉了吗?于是,我举手问:“您是说,我刚花了22. 5美元买了本我们不用的书?”
" Good,"replied the professor with a smile."Your re starting to think already."
“很好!"教授笑着说:“你已经开始思考了。”