艺海秦声
Since we came to the world,the importance of the family had appeared.With our parents' help,we gradually grow up.In the family,we can get a lot of suggestions from our parents.They tell us not to play on the streets,or how to get well along with others.Sometimes their advice is great,but there're some times they give us a bad advice.However,whatever they say,we can feel their love from their actions and behaviors.We always feel happy because parents are around us all the time. Family is a place where we get care.Family is really important to us all.
百度钱包丶
Today many students like listening to the music while do the homework . I think this is a bad habit. listen to music 不加the，while doing homeworkFirst , listen to the music while do the homework will disperse us attention , can`t make our brain focus on one thing us改成our ,which can't make our mind focus So this habit will reduce our work efficiency may lead to the mistakes our working efficiency and may lead to mistakesSecond,use earphone listen to concert to cause hearing for a long time , have loud injury to we student . using earphones to enjoy music for a long time may cause hearing impairment.The last,choose some melody in a quick rhythm it will make student feel nervous but choose one song in a slow rhythm will make student asleep in summer and winter . choosing some melodies in quick rhythm will make students feel nervous but choosing.......will make students fall asleepI think listen to the music while do the homework is a bad habit , ti will bring more harm than good. i think listening to music while doing homework is a bad habit .最后一句不是清楚该怎么改，感觉文章确实有点chinglish。语法有点乱。其中有些地方我也不知道怎么改。···汗一个
易买易得
1,store=>stores2,near the our... 去掉 the 或者 our3，The other =>Another4, because it have => because it has 5,friedy=>friendly 6, it is not the most expensive and it isn't the cheapest 改成 things in this store have a moderate price. 这家店的东西价格适中。7，But it still the most popular store改成 It is the most popular store.8,The Jenny's department Store is the more fash on able then the Carol's department Store改成Things in Jenny's Department Store are more fashionable than those in Carol's Department Store. 珍妮百货商店的东西比卡罗尔的时尚。9，It is has the best service but it is the is it the more expensive than Carol's Department Store,too! 改成 The things are more expensive than those in Carol's Department Store though it has the best service. 尽管它有最好的服务，但是东西的价格比卡罗尔百货商店的贵。10,The Ham's bargain Store is the cheapest. But is also the worst.改成 Things in Ham's Bargain Store are the cheapest. 火腿廉价商店的东西最便宜。11,But is also the worst. 改成 But their quality is the worst. 但是它们的质量是最差的。认真地该过了，望采纳～ ：）
懒洋洋一家
有些句子我都不知道怎么改啊，很chinese english的感觉～说点语法小错误吧～disperse us attention--our attentionSo this habit will reduce our work efficiency may lead to the mistakes .是什么样的文章？雅思的话最好不要用so,用therefore之类的比较正式。may 前面要加and或that,不然没有主语或是个错误的复句。use earphone listen to concert to cause hearing for a long time , have loud injury to we student .这句好难改啊～我是中国人都有点不太明白。we student -严重的错误。也许你可以写成：if students spend too much on listening the conert by earphone,it may effect the sense of hearing of students.choose some melody in a quick rhythm it will make student feel nervous but choose one song in a slow rhythm will make student asleep in summer and winter .我觉得choose是多余的，你硬要写的话应该要写成choosing,其实直接写quick rhythm melody就可以吧～make student fall asleep 更好吧～其他的就是注意句式的多样性，你一直在重复listening to the music while doing homework,3次。就说这么多！
