缠藤小妖
Goldilocks and the Three Bears Papa Bear,Mama Bear,and Baby Bear lived in the forest. “Ring,”went the telephone.”Come to my house for lunch,” said Auntie Bear. “Yes,we will come,”said Mama Bear. She set out bowls of stew to cool for supper. Then,the Bears went to Auntie Bear’s house. A little girl named Goldilocks lived in the village. She discovered the Bears’ house and went inside Without asking.She sat in a chair. “This chair is too hard!”she complained. The next chair was smaller,but too soft. The third chair was just right. She sat down with a flop,and the chair legs gave way. Goldilocks saw the three bowls of stew. The big bowl was much too hot! “Maybe this bowl will be cooler,”she said. Goldilocks was right,but it was too cold. She grabbed the third bowl and gobbled it down. It was just right. Then with a yawn,she headed upstairs to the bedroom. Goldilocks tried the first bed,but it was too hard. The next was too soft. Goldilocks sighed and fell asleep as she was lying in the third bed. When the Bears arrived home,Papa Bear shouted, “Somebody’s been sitting on my chair!”Mama Bear cried, “Somebody’s been sitting on my chair!”Then Baby Bear cried, “Somebody’s been sitting on my chair and now it’s all broken!” In the kitchen,Papa Bear looked into his bowl of stew.He said, “Somebody’s been eating my stew!”Mama Bear cried, “Somebody’s been eating my stew!”Baby Bear cried, “Somebody’s been eating my stew,and they ate it all up!” The three bears growled as they climbed the bedroom stairs. Papa Bear growled,”Somebody’s been sleeping in my bed!” Mama Bear growled,”Somebody’s been sleeping in my bed!” Baby Bear cried,”Somebody’s been sleeping in my bed, and there she is!” Goldilocks woke up and wanted to run away, but no one could move.They all froze in their tracks. “Please,forgive me,”Goldilocks cried. The Bears forgave her. Goldilocks quit sneaking into people’s homes.
吃那么一天
讽刺的英文irony。
n. （出乎意料的）奇异可笑之处，具有讽刺意味的情况；反语，讽刺
adj. 铁的；含铁的；似铁的
短语
verbal irony 言语反讽 ; 语言倒反
dramatic irony 戏剧反讽 ; 戏剧性讽刺
Socratic irony 苏格拉底反诘法 ; 苏格拉底式反讽 ; 苏格拉底式的反讽 ; 苏格拉底的反讽
Irony Of Fate 命运的捉弄 ; 命运反讽 ; 命运讽喻 ; 命运的嘲弄
situational irony 情景反讽 ; 情境反讽 ; 场景反讽
Irony and Pity 关于讽刺
同根词
词根： iron
adj.
iron 铁的；残酷的；刚强的
ironic 讽刺的；反话的
ironical 讽刺的（等于ironic）；用反语的
adv.
ironically讽刺地；说反话地
n.
iron 熨斗；烙铁；坚强
ironist 讽刺家；讽刺作家
飞鸟鱼虫菲菲
讽刺的英文：satire。
读音：英[ˈsætaɪər]、美[ˈsætaɪər]。
释义：n. 讽刺；讽刺文学，讽刺作品。
例句：He is good at writing social satire.
他擅长写作社会讽刺小说。
变形：复数satires。
satire造句。
1、The commercial side of the Christmas season is an easy target for satire.
圣诞节期间商业化的一面很容易成为讽刺的对象。
2、He tried to smite her pride with his satire.
他想通过自己的讽刺来打击她的自尊。
3、Many Americans also love the satire aspect of late night shows, especially when the hosts roast politicians.
许多美国人也喜欢晚间秀的讽刺挖苦的特点，尤其是主持人吐槽政客的时候。
4、Her play was a cruel satire on life in the 80s.
她的剧作是对80年代生活的辛辣讽刺。
刘小淼淼淼
Stop complaining！ 别发牢骚！
You make me sick！ 你真让我恶心！
You shouldn't have done that！ 你真不应该那样做！
You're a jerk！ 你是个废物/混球！
Don't talk to me like that！ 别那样和我说话！
Who do you think you are？ 你以为你是谁？
What's your problem？ 你怎么回事啊？
I hate you！ 我讨厌你！
I don't want to see your face！ 我不愿再见到你！
You're crazy！ 你疯了！
Don't bother me. 别烦我。
Knock it off. 少来这一套。
What's the meaning of this？ 这是什么意思？
How dare you！ 你敢！
Cut it out. 省省吧。
You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
1. Stop complaining！ 别发牢骚！
2. You make me sick！ 你真让我恶心！
3. You shouldn't have done that！ 你真不应该那样做！
4. You're a jerk！ 你是个废物/混球！
5. Don't talk to me like that！ 别那样和我说话！
6. Who do you think you are？ 你以为你是谁？
7. What's your problem？ 你怎么回事啊？
8. I hate you！ 我讨厌你！
9. I don't want to see your face！ 我不愿再见到你！
10. You're crazy！ 你疯了！
11. Don't bother me. 别烦我。
12. Knock it off. 少来这一套。
13. What's the meaning of this？ 这是什么意思？
14. How dare you！ 你敢！
15. Cut it out. 省省吧。
16. You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
学学老外是如何用英语损人的绝句
我们中国有“杀人不见血”之说，老外损起人来，也是“惊天地，泣鬼神”，一起看看吧！
1.Got into the gene pool while lifeguard wasn't watching.
1.他肯定是趁救生员不备，跳进基因池。
2.A room temperature IQ.
2.IQ值简直和室温一样高。
3.During evolution,his ancestors were in the control group.
3.进化时，他的祖先肯定是当权派。（要不是走后门，他怎么有机会进化成人？ ）
4.Has two brains;one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
4.他有两个大脑，一个丢了，另一个去找去了。
5.He's so dense,the light bends around his.
5.他太蠢了，光碰到他多要拐向走。
6.If he were any more stupid,he'd have to be watered twice a week.
6.如果他再笨点儿，就要一周给他浇两次水了。（把他当植物来看了。）
7.Some drink from the fountain of knowledge,but he just gargled.
7.人家畅饮智慧之泉，他只是拿来漱了漱口。
8.It takes him an-hour-and-a-half to watch "60 Minutes".
8.他要花一个半小时来观察一个小时。
9.He sets low personal standards and then consistently fail to achieve them.
9.他给自己设定的标准很低，但每次还是达不到。
10.If you gave him a penny for his thoughts,you'd get change.
10.如果你用一分钱买他的想法，你还能拿到找零的。
1. Stop complaining！ 别发牢骚！ 2. You make me sick！ 你真让我恶心！ 3. What's wrong with you？ 你怎么回事？ 4. You shouldn't have done that！ 你真不应该那样做！ 5. You're a jerk！ 你是个废物/混球！ 6. Don't talk to me like that！ 别那样和我说话！ 7. Who do you think you are？ 你以为你是谁？ 8. What's your problem？ 你怎么回事啊？ 9. I hate you！ 我讨厌你！ 10. I don't want to see your face！ 我不愿再见到你！ 11. You're crazy！ 你疯了！ 12. Are you insane/crazy/out of your mind？ 你疯了吗？（美国人绝对常用！） 13. Don't bother me. 别烦我。
14. Knock it off. 少来这一套。 15. Get out of my face. 从我面前消失！ 16. Leave me alone. 走开。
17. Get lost.滚开！ 18. Take a hike！ 哪儿凉快哪儿歇着去吧。 19. You piss me off. 你气死我了。
20. It's none of your business. 关你屁事！ 21. What's the meaning of this？ 这是什么意思？ 22. How dare you！ 你敢！ 23. Cut it out. 省省吧。 24. You stupid jerk！ 你这蠢猪！ 25. You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
26. I'm fed up. 我厌倦了。 27. I can't take it anymore. 我受不了了！（李阳老师常用） 28. I've had enough of your garbage. 我听腻了你的废话。
29. Shut up！ 闭嘴！ 30. What do you want？ 你想怎么样？ 31. Do you know what time it is？ 你知道现在都几点吗？ 32. What were you thinking？ 你脑子进水啊？ 33. How can you say that？ 你怎么可以这样说？ 34. Who says？ 谁说的？ 35. That's what you think！ 那才是你脑子里想的！ 36. Don't look at me like that. 别那样看着我。 37. What did you say？ 你说什么？ 38. You are out of your mind. 你脑子有毛病！ 39. You make me so mad.你气死我了啦。
40. Drop dead. 去死吧！ 41. **** off. 滚蛋。 42. Don't give me your ****. 别跟我胡扯。
43. Don't give me your excuses/ No more excuses. 别找借口。 44. You're a pain in the ass. 你这讨厌鬼。
45. You're an asshole. 你这缺德鬼。 46. You bastard！ 你这杂种！ 47. Get over yourself. 别自以为是。
48. You're nothing to me. 你对我什么都不是。 49. It's not my fault. 不是我的错。
50. You look guilty. 你看上去心虚。 51. I can't help it. 我没办法。
52. That's your problem. 那是你的问题。 53. I don't want to hear it. 我不想听！ 54. Get off my back. 少跟我罗嗦。
55. Give me a break. 饶了我吧。 56. Who do you think you're talking to？ 你以为你在跟谁说话？ 57. Look at this mess！ 看看这烂摊子！ 58. You're so careless. 你真粗心。
59. Why on earth didn't you tell me the truth？ 你到底为什么不跟我说实话？ 60. I'm about to explode！ 我肺都快要气炸了！ 61. What a stupid idiot！ 真是白痴一个！ 62. I'm not going to put up with this！ 我再也受不了啦！ 63. I never want to see your face again！ 我再也不要见到你！ 64. That's terrible. 真糟糕！ 65. Just look at what you've done！ 看看你都做了些什么！ 66. I wish I had never met you. 我真后悔这辈子遇到你！ 67. You're a disgrace. 你真丢人！ 68. I'll never forgive you！ 我永远都不会饶恕你！ 69. Don't nag me！ 别在我面前唠叨！ 70. I'm sick of it. 我都腻了。 71. You're such a bitch！ 你这个婊子！ 72. Stop screwing/ fooling/ messing around！ 别鬼混了！ 73. Mind your own business！ 管好你自己的事！ 74. You're just a good for nothing bum！ 你真是一个废物！/ 你一无是处！ 75. You've gone too far！ 你太过分了！ 76. I loathe you！ 我讨厌你！ 77. I detest you！ 我恨你！ 78. Get the hell out of here！ 滚开！ 79. Don't be that way！ 别那样！ 80. Can't you do anything right？ 成事不足，败事有余。
81. You're impossible. 你真不可救药。 82. Don't touch me！ 别碰我！ 83. Get away from me！ 离我远一点儿！ 84. Get out of my life. 我不愿再见到你。
/ 从我的生活中消失吧。 85. You're a joke！ 你真是一个小丑！ 86. Don't give me your attitude. 别跟我摆架子。
87. You'll be sorry. 你会后悔的。 88. We're through. 我们完了！ 89. Look at the mess you've made！ 你搞得一团糟！ 90. You've ruined everything. 全都让你搞砸了。
91. I can't believe your never. 你好大的胆子！ 92. You're away too far. 你太过分了。 93. I can't take you any more！ 我再也受不了你啦！ 94. I'm telling you for the last time！ 我最后再告诉你一次！ 95. I could kill you！ 我宰了你！ 96. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard！ 那是我听到的最愚蠢的事！（比尔·盖茨常用） 97. I can't believe a word you say. 我才不信你呢！ 98. You never tell the truth！ 你从来就不说实话！ 99. Don't push me ！ 别逼我！ 100. Enough is enough！ 够了够了！ 101. Don't waste my time anymore. 别再浪费我的时间了！ 102. Don't make so much noise. I'm working. 别吵，我在干活。
103. It's unfair. 太不公平了。 104. I'm very disappointed. 真让我失望。
105. Don't panic！ 别怕！ 106. What 。
1. You make me sick！ 你真让我恶心！ 2. What's wrong with you？ 你怎么回事？ 3. I'm very disappointed. 真让我失望。
4. Go to hell. 去死吧。 5. You're a jerk！ 你是个废物/混球！ 6. Don't talk to me like that！ 别那样和我说话！ 7. Who do you think you are？ 你以为你是谁？ 8. What's your problem？ 你怎么回事啊？ 9. I hate you！ 我讨厌你！ 10. I don't want to see your face！ 我不愿再见到你！ 11. You're crazy！ 你疯了！ 12. Are you insane/crazy/out of your mind？ 你疯了吗？ 13. Don't bother me. 别烦我。
14. Knock it off. 少来这一套。 15. Get out of my face. 从我面前消失！ 16. Leave me alone. 走开。
17. Get lost.滚开！ 18. Take a hike！ 哪儿凉快哪儿歇着去吧。 19. You piss me off. 你气死我了。
20. It's none of your business. 关你屁事！ 21. What's the meaning of this？ 这是什么意思？ 22. How dare you！ 你敢！ 23. Cut it out. 省省吧。 24. You stupid jerk！ 你这蠢*！ 25. You have a lot of nerve. 脸皮真厚。
26. I'm fed up. 我厌倦了。 27. I can't take it anymore. 我受不了了！（李阳老师常用） 28. I've had enough of your garbage. 我听腻了你的废话。
29. Shut up！ 闭嘴！ 30. What do you want？ 你想怎么样？ 31. Do you know what time it is？ 你知道现在都几点吗？ 32. What were you thinking？ 你脑子进水啊？ 33. How can you say that？ 你怎么可以这样说？ 34. Who says？ 谁说的？ 35. That's what you think！ 那才是你脑子里想的！ 36. Don't look at me like that. 别那样看着我。 37. What did you say？ 你说什么？ 38. You are out of your mind. 你脑子有毛病！ 39. You make me so mad.你气死我了啦。
40. Drop dead. 去死吧！ 41. Don't give me your shoot. 别跟我胡扯。 42. Don't give me your excuses/ No more excuses. 别找借口。
43. Nonsense！ 鬼话！ 44. You're a pain in the ass. 你这讨厌鬼。 45. You're an asshole. 你这缺德鬼。
46. You asked for it. 你自找的。 47. Get over yourself. 别自以为是。
48. You're nothing to me. 你对我什么都不是。 49. It's not my fault. 不是我的错。
50. You look guilty. 你看上去心虚。 51. I can't help it. 我没办法。
52. That's your problem. 那是你的问题。 53. I don't want to hear it. 我不想听！ 54. Get off my back. 少跟我罗嗦。
55. Give me a break. 饶了我吧。 56. Who do you think you're talking to？ 你以为你在跟谁说话？ 57. Look at this mess！ 看看这烂摊子！ 58. You're so careless. 你真粗心。
59. Why on earth didn't you tell me the truth？ 你到底为什么不跟我说实话？ 60. I'm about to explode！ 我肺都快要气炸了！ 61. What a stupid idiot！ 真是白痴一个！ 62. I'm not going to put up with this！ 我再也受不了啦！ 63. I never want to see your face again！ 我再也不要见到你！ 64. That's terrible. 真糟糕！ 65. Just look at what you've done！ 看看你都做了些什么！ 66. I wish I had never met you. 我真后悔这辈子遇到你！ 67. You're a disgrace. 你真丢人！ 68. I'll never forgive you！ 我永远都不会饶恕你！ 69. Don't nag me！ 别在我面前唠叨！ 70. I'm sick of it. 我都腻了。 71. Don't you dare come back again！ 你敢再回来！ 72. Stop screwing/ fooling/ messing around！ 别鬼混了！ 73. Mind your own business！ 管好你自己的事！ 74. You're just a good for nothing bum！ 你真是一个废物！/ 你一无是处！ 75. You've gone too far！ 你太过分了！ 76. I loathe you！ 我讨厌你！ 77. I detest you！ 我恨你！ 78. Get the hell out of here！ 滚开！ 79. Don't be that way！ 别那样！ 80. Can't you do anything right？ 成事不足，败事有余。
81. You're impossible. 你真不可救药。 82. Don't touch me！ 别碰我！ 83. Get away from me！ 离我远一点儿！ 84. Get out of my life. 我不愿再见到你。
/ 从我的生活中消失吧。 85. You're a joke！ 你真是一个小丑！ 86. Don't give me your attitude. 别跟我摆架子。
87. You'll be sorry. 你会后悔的。 88. We're through. 我们完了！ 89. Look at the mess you've made！ 你搞得一团糟！ 90. You've ruined everything. 全都让你搞砸了。
91. I can't believe your never. 你好大的胆子！ 92. You're away too far. 你太过分了。 93. I can't take you any more！ 我再也受不了你啦！ 94. I'm telling you for the last time！ 我最后再告诉你一次！ 95. I could kill you！ 我宰了你！ 96. That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard！ 那是我听到的最愚蠢的事！ （比尔·盖茨常用） 97. I can't believe a word you say. 我才不信你呢！ 98. You never tell the truth！ 你从来就不说实话！ 99. Don't push me ！ 别逼我。
派大海绵
一、w.bush: doctor, what is wrong with my brain? doctor: your brain is perfectly ok. w.bush: how come? doctor: you are the same as everybody else, having right brain and life brain. w.bush: and? doctor: but yours is even far bether than all the others. w.bush: oh? doctor: yes, sir, everybody’s brain is not seperated so perfect. but yours is an exception. w.bush: tell me how could it be an exception, not because I am the head of USA. I hope. doctor: sir, your brain is really seperated completely, there is nothing right in your left brain, and there is nothing left in your right brain. 布什和医生的笑话。 注意下最后一句。是一语双关 二、He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？ 约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？ 约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。 三、Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 醉酒 一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！” 四、Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。 五、Logic Reasoning A fourth-grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson on logic. "Here is the situation," she said. "a man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river, fishing. He loses his balance, falls in, and begins splashing and yellin g for help. His wife hears the commotion, knows that he can't swim, and runs down to the bank. Why do you think she ran to the bank?" A girl raised her hand and asked, "to draw out all of his savings?" 逻辑推理 小学四年级的教师正在给学生们上一堂逻辑课。她举了这么一个例子：“有这样一种情况，一个男人在河中心的船上钓鱼，突然失去重心掉进了水里。于是他开始挣扎并喊救命。他的妻子听到了他的喊声，知道他并不会游泳，所以她就急忙跑向河岸。谁能告诉我这是为什么？” 一个女生举手答道，“是不是去取他的存款？” [注]bank在英语中除了我们平时很熟悉的“银行”之外，还有“河岸”的意思。 六、（纯属娱乐）英语小笑话 上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的 一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了.
