• 回答数

    2

  • 浏览数

    91

君临天下之嚻
首页 > 英语培训 > 短篇英语笑话

2个回答 默认排序
  • 默认排序
  • 按时间排序

依锦风韵

已采纳

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。我分享关于短篇 英语笑话 ,希望可以帮助大家! 关于短篇英语笑话:Work Smarter, Not Harder A clergyman, walking down a country lane, sees a young farmer struggling to reload a cart that had lost its load of hay. "You look hot, my son," said the cleric. "Why don't you rest a moment and then I'll give you a hand?" "No, thanks," said the young boy. "My father wouldn't like it." "Don't be silly," the minister said. "Everyone is entitled to a break. Come, have a drink of water. Rest in the shade." Again the young man protested. "Oh, no, sir. My father would be real mad!" Losing his patience, the clergyman said, "Your father must be a real slave driver. Tell me where I can find him; I'll give him a piece of my mind!" The young farmer replied, "He's right there under that pile of hay!" 关于短篇英语笑话:Biggest Sex Life Lie A minister passed a group of teenaged boys sitting on the church lawn. "Evening, boys. What are you doing?" "Nothing much, Pastor," replied the one lad. "We're just seeing who can tell the biggest lie about his sex life." "Boys, boys, boys!" intoned the minister. "I'm shocked. When I was your age, I never thought about sex at all." The boys looked at each other and then said in unison, "You win, Pastor!" 关于短篇英语笑话:Catholic School Little Tommy's parents had tried everything to help his math grade: tutors, flash cards, "Hooked on Math," special learning centers, everything. Finally, they enrolled him in the local Catholic school. The very first day, he came home with a very serious look on his face, went straight to his room, and started studying. His mother was amazed. Books and paper were spread out everywhere and Little Tommy was hard at work. As soon as dinner was through, he marched right back up to his room without a word and studied some more. This went on for weeks until Little Tommy proudly brought home his report card and showed it to his parents: An A in Math! "Tommy! This is great! I'm so proud of you! Son, what was it? What helped motivate you? Was it the nuns?" Little Tommy shook his head. "Well, then, was it the books? The discipline? The structure? The uniforms? What?" Little Tommy looked at her and said, "Well, Mom, it's like this. When I saw that guy out in the lobby nailed to a plus sign, I knew they weren't screwing around!" 关于短篇英语笑话:Throw It All Into A River A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd throw it all into the river." With greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd throw it all into the river." And finally he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd throw it all into the river, too!" As he took his chair, the song leader stood and announced with a smile, "For our closinghymn, let us sing number 365:" "Shall We Gather at the River." 关于短篇英语笑话:Fallen An old priest got sick of everyone in his parish confessing adultery. During one Sunday's sermon he told them, "If one more person confesses to adultery, I'll quit!" Since everyone liked him, they decided to use a code word: "fallen." >From then on, anyone who had committed adultery said they had "fallen." This satisfied the old priest and the parishioners, and everything was fine for years, until finally the old priest passed away at the ripe old age of 93. Shortly after the new young priest settled in, he paid a call on the mayor. The priest was quite concerned. "You have to do something about the sidewalks in this town, Mayor. You can't believe how many people come into the confessional talking about having fallen!" The mayor started to laugh, realizing that no one had explained their code word to the new priest. But before the mayor could explain, the priest shook his finger at the mayor and said, "I don't know why you're laughing; your wife fell three times last week!"

短篇英语笑话

219 评论(14)

桃紅梨白

英语简短笑话大全

导语:阅读笑话,为生活创造更多的快乐。以下是我整理的英语简短笑话大全,欢迎各位的阅读与参考。

英语简短笑话【1】

顾客:小心,你的大拇指在我汤里了!

服务员:别担心,先生,不是很烫!

Diner: Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!

Waiter: Don't worry, Sir, it's not that hot!

英语简短笑话【2】

一个服务员给顾客拿来了牛排,大拇指在牛肉上。

“你疯了吗?”顾客喊到,“你的`手在我的牛排上!”

“什么?”服务员说,“你想让它再掉地上?”

A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.

"Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?"

"What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"

英语简短笑话【3】

服务员:茶或咖啡?先生。

第一个顾客:我要茶

第二个顾客:我也是茶——杯子要干净的!

服务员:两杯茶,哪个要干净的杯子?

Waiter: "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?"

1st customer: "I'll have tea."

2nd customer: "Me, too - and be sure the glass is clean!"

(Waiter exits, returns)

Waiter: "Two teas. Which one asked for the clean glass?"

英语简短笑话【4】

服务员,这只苍蝇在我汤里干什么?

看起来象是在仰泳,先生……

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?

Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir...

英语简短笑话【5】

服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!

别担心,先生,面包里的蜘蛛会干掉它。

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!

Don't worry sir, the spider on the breadroll will get 'em.

英语简短笑话【6】

服务员,我汤里有只苍蝇!

不是,先生,那是蟑螂,苍蝇在你牛排里。

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!

No sir, that's a cockroach, the fly is on your steak.

英语简短笑话【7】

服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!

别让别人看见,先生,要不别人都要。

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!

Keep it down sir, or they'll all be wanting one.

英语简短笑话【8】

服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!

我知道,先生,我们没有另收钱。

Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!

Its OK, Sir, there's no extra charge!

英语简短笑话【9】

服务员,汤里有只苍蝇!

对不起,先生,我弄走那三个时忘了这个。

Waiter, there is a fly in my soup!

Sorry sir, maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three.

英语简短笑话【10】

服务员,汤里有只死苍蝇!

是的,先生,是开水杀死了它们。

Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!

Yes sir, it's the hot water that kills them.

英语简短笑话【11】

服务员,汤里有只死苍蝇!

1美元你想要什么——活的?

aiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!

What do you expect for $1 - a live one?

英语简短笑话【12】

服务员,汤里有只蜜蜂!

是的,先生,今天苍蝇放假。

Waiter, waiter, there's a bee in my soup.

Yes Sir, it's the fly's day off.

英语简短笑话【13】

服务员,来杯咖啡,不加奶油。

对不起,先生,奶油没了,不加奶怎么样?

Waiter, I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.

I'm sorry, sir, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?

英语简短笑话【14】

服务员,你的领带在我的汤里了。

没关系,先生,它不缩水。

Waiter, your tie is in my soup!

That's all right, sir, it's not shrinkable.

161 评论(8)

相关问答