晨馨1205
作为一种独特的娱乐方式,笑话能够帮助人们减轻压力、放松心情、缓解疲劳,有利于身体健康。我整理了30秒好笑的 英语笑话 ,欢迎阅读!30秒好笑的英语笑话篇一 When a student failed to solve a math problem in class, he expressed his regret to his teacher. "I remember solving the problem in my dream last night, but for the time being I've forgotten it . What can that mean?""It means that you are more intelligent in dreams than when you are awake," the teacher explained. 一名学生在班上没有做出老师的教学题,他感到很遗憾,对老师解释说:“我记得昨天夜里做梦对这道题解对了,但现在一时想不起来了。这说明什么?”“这说明你做梦的时候比你醒着的时候更聪明”。老师解释说。 30秒好笑的英语笑话篇二 A story around campus has it that a student once sent a telegram to his parents reading: "Mom - flunked(不及格,失败) all courses. Kicked out of school. Prepare Pop."Two days later he received a response: "Pop prepared. Prepare yourself." 校园里流传着这样的 故事 :一个学生一次给父母拍了一份电报,上面写着:“妈妈,我所有功课都不及格,被学校开除。让爸爸做好准备。”两天以后,他收到了回电:“爸爸已准备好。你自己做好准备吧!” 30秒好笑的英语笑话篇三 Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 醉酒 一天,父亲与小儿子一道回家。这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄,老是有提不完的问题。他向父亲发问道:“爸爸,‘醉’字是什么意思?” “唔,孩子,”父亲回答说,“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。如果我把他们看成了四个,那么我就算醉了。” “可是,爸爸, ”孩子说,“那儿只有一个警察呀!” 30秒好笑的英语笑话篇四 He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆:约翰尼,你小弟弟好吗? 约翰尼:他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆:真糟糕,怎么回事儿? 约翰尼:我们做游戏,看谁能把身子探出窗外最远,他赢了。 30秒好笑的英语笑话篇五 A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, "No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live." Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 40 Years? "God replied, "I didn't recognize you." 一名中年妇女心脏病突发被送到了医院, 在手术台上,濒临死亡之际,她看到了上帝, 于是,她问上帝是不是她的日子到头了。 上帝回答说,“还没有,你还能活43年,2个月零8天。” 身体快要康复的时候,这名女士想到自己还要活那么多年,得好好对待自己,于是决定先不出院,而是去给自己整整容,吸吸脂,隆隆胸,然后还做了一个腹部拉皮和 其它 一些美容美体手术。 她甚至还请人到医院里面帮她头发给染了。 做完最后一个手术,这位女士出院了, 但就在过马路的时候,她被一辆风驰电挚赶回医院的救护车给撞死了。 再一次,她又站到了上帝的面前,她大惑不解地问上帝,“我记得你说我还能再活40年?” 上帝回答,“那个时候我没认出你来”。
yq1109胖丫头
英语课堂的幽默笑话
幽默笑话是娱乐休闲类的读物。我整理的英语课堂的幽默笑话,喜欢的赶紧来看下吧!
英语课堂的幽默笑话1
小明上英文课时跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?
老师说:Go ahead.
小明就坐了下来。
过了一会儿,小明又跟老师说:May I go to the toilet?
老师说:Go ahead.
小明又坐了下来。他旁边的同学于是忍不住问:你不是跟老师说要上厕所吗?怎么不去?
小明说:你没听老师说“去你个头”啊!
英语课堂的幽默笑话2
某日,小明学习了how to spell it?这一句型。回家后,妈妈看见他手上的玩具表,问道:
妈妈:What’s on your hand?
小明:Watch.
妈妈:How to spell that?
小明:T-H-A-T~
英语课堂的幽默笑话3
某日,老师教小涛,英语中,姓氏可以放在名字后面。小明放学后碰到一个外国人,于是他勇敢地上去与外国人对话。
小明:How are you? My name is HongTao Liu.
外国人:Oh, my god! 我还是方片七呢!
英语课堂的幽默笑话4
一日,小明心情有很好,于是他夸赞英语老师漂亮。
小明:Miss Jiang, you are very beautiful.
老师听后心花怒放,嘴上还要谦虚一下:“哪里,哪里”。
小明心想:老师的意思就是“Where? Where?",天哪,还有这样的人,非要追问哪里漂亮的,干脆马屁拍到底:
"Everywhere, everywhere."
老师:……
英语课堂的幽默笑话5
小明刻苦学习英语,终有小成。一日上街不慎与一老外相撞, 忙说:I am sorry.
老外应道:I am sorry too.
小明听后又道:I am sorry three.
老外不解,问:What are you sorry for?
小明无奈,道:I am sorry five.
英语课堂的幽默笑话6
一日,小明上课打磕睡,于是英语老师向小明提问。
老师:小明,How are you是什么意思?
小明心想:how是怎么,you 是你,于是回答“怎么是你?”
老师很生气,又问:“那How old are you ?是什么意思?”
小明心想:old是老的,于是回答怎么老是你?”
老师:……
catcat654321
man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"那一百万年呢?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟."Once two hunters went hunting in the forest. One of them suddenly fell down by accident. He showed the whites of his eyes and seemed to have ceased breathing. The other hunter soon took out his mobile phone to call the emergency center for help. The operator said calmly:"First, you should make sure that he is already dead." Then the operator heard a gunshot from the other end of the phone and next he heard the hunter asking:"What should I do next?" 两个猎人进森林里打猎,其中一个猎人不慎跌倒,两眼翻白,似已停止呼吸。另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。接线员沉着地说:“第一步,要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。”于是,接线员在电话里听到一声枪响,然后听到那猎人接着问:“第二步怎办?”Talking clock会说话的钟While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?""Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's two o'clock in the morning!"一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓,甚是得意。“那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?”他的一个朋友问他。“那玩意儿厉害了,那是一个会说话的钟”,学生回答。“这钟怎么工作的”,他的朋友问。“看着,别眨眼了”,那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子,拼命地敲了一下,声音震耳欲聋。突然,他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫,“别敲了,你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!”Secret For a Long LifeA woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch."I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says. "What's your secret for a long, happy life?""I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise.""Wow, that's amazing," says the woman. "How old are you?""Twenty-six."长寿秘诀一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。“我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,”那女士说。“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”“我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼。”“哦,真神奇,”女士说。“你高寿?”
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