英语小品2人

旁白：在很久很久以前，有一个叫XX的王国，里面住着国王一家人，还有若干仆人，但是，国王和王后没有孩子……王后祈祷状：神啊，请赐给我一个皮肤像雪一样白，嘴唇像血一样红的孩子吧~PS：我要男孩！旁白：神听到了王后的祈祷，于是，派了一只乌鸦叼了一个婴孩给王后。乌鸦上场：傻瓜，傻瓜，傻瓜……（龙套过场，丢下一婴孩）王后惊喜的喊：阿娜答，快来看看，这是上天赐给我们的礼物啊~国王上场：哦，我的上帝，真是个美丽的孩子，亲爱的，我看我们就叫他XX吧~王后反对：不，我觉得叫XX更好听。国王伸手：那好吧~老规矩！王后和国王猜拳：石头、剪子、布！王后雀跃的看着孩子：哦也~亲爱的XX，以后你的名字就叫XX了哦~（XX的我很汗啊~）国王宣布：为了庆祝我老来得子，我要宴请天下臣民，来啊，摆个三天三夜的流水席！某财政长官哭喊着上：陛下，我们要工资！国王一挥手，财政长官被士兵拖下。国王沉思状：看来还是光请些重量级的人物就好了……旁白：于是，国王和王后邀请了被称之为“十三点”的仙女组合，来为公主洗礼。仙女1：我赐予小公主和我一样无与伦比的美貌！（旁白：呕吐~）仙女2：我赐予小公主无与伦比的智慧，就像我一样！（旁白：8+8=？ 仙女2不假思索的回答：27！）仙女3：我，我赐予小公主，无，无与伦比的，口，口才……（旁白直接上来贴橡皮膏）仙女4：我赐予小公主像我一样的温柔性情，哦活活~（三段式大笑~）仙女5：我赐予小公主善良的心！（阴险的拿起草人，我钉我钉我钉钉钉~）仙女6：我赐予小公主正直勇敢的心！克塞前来拜访！（或者代表月亮惩治罪恶，也可以~关键是动作！）（旁白：啊，蟑螂啊~ 仙女6：救命啊~瞬间跑没影了~）仙女7：我赐予小公主永远也不变形的身材！（大象的照片就此走过~）仙女8：我要赐予小公主美妙的嗓音！（后台响起锯床腿的声音~）仙女9：我赐予小公主永远也花不完的金钱！（国王点头中：还是这个实用点~）仙女10：我会保佑小公主永远受到人民的爱戴！仙女11：我会赐予小公主幸福！仙女12：我要赐给小公主我们“13点”组合的思维逻辑！哦活活~（众人企求状： ……ya ma da……）仙女13：我要赐予小公主……旁白：正在最后一位仙女要赐予小公主祝福的时候，突然之间电闪雷鸣，世界发生了异变（语气异常的沉重~）不明人物1登场：为了防止世界被破~~坏 （抖几声~）不明人物2：为了维护世界的和~~平 （继续抖~）1：换之爱与真实的邪恶 2：可恶又讨厌的反派角色！ 1指着自己：x魔女 2同样指着自己：跟班儿…… 1&2拥抱在一起：我们是穿梭在xyz中的x组合！！ 1伸出手臂做期待状：黑洞，黑色的明天在等着我们！ 乌鸦跑龙套：就是这样！傻瓜~傻瓜~旁白惊恐：大事不好了，万恶的魔女出现了！魔女（一手指天一手指地，做唯我独尊状）：这么大的一个宴会居然没有邀请我这个宇宙间第一玉树临风、英俊潇洒、风流倜傥的魔女？！国王：那个，是因为您老老搬家，所以……魔女手一挥：辩解无用！既然大家都送了小公主礼物，那我也来送一样吧~（当当当当~跟班敲手鼓ing~）小公主确实无忧无虑的生活着，但到了16岁生日那天，她就会被一根香蕉给噎死，哇哈哈哈哈~~~噎死吧~~~旁白：停停停，不是应该被纺车给扎死吗？魔女：你家有纺车吗？旁白：木有！魔女：都什么年代了，换点花样吧~旁白：但是……魔女（威胁）：我说是噎死的就是噎死的，你再废话，我咬死你哦~旁白苦大仇深状：于是，可怜的公主就这样被可恶的魔女诅咒了！魔女欢快的：你是风儿我是沙，缠缠绵绵绕天涯……（退场~）国王和王后担心的：怎么办啊？我可怜的孩子居然被诅咒了……仙女13：请不要担心，我的祝福还没有送出呢？国王：那你为什么不送呢？仙女13羞怯的：因为我这里的热线比较忙~王后：请仙女赶快解除魔女的诅咒吧~仙女13：好吧~我所给的祝福就是：小公主会在16岁生日那天被一根香蕉噎着，但不会死去，而是沉睡，直到一个真心爱着她的王子出现亲吻她一下，那时小公主就会醒来，并且永远幸福的生活下去。国王：为什么不一下子解除魔女的诅咒呢？仙女13双手交握：因为这样比较浪漫啊~众人上来一阵狂踩：打你个有虐待倾向的……旁白：暴力场面请自动忽略，时间过的飞快，一眨眼，公主已经16岁了，她真是又美丽又善良，家中闲妻良母的典范啊~公主跳着上场：我是女生，漂亮的女生~先发一半，后面的再说~找人算帐去 Voice: In the long, long time ago, there was a kingdom called XX, which is home to the King family, there are a number of servants, but the king and queen had no children ... ...Queen-like prayer: Oh God, please give me a skin as white as snow, lips as red as the blood of children bar ~ PS: I want a boy!Voice: God heard the Queen's prayer, then, sent a crow Diao had a baby to the Queen.Crows play: Fool, fool, a fool ... ... (bit-part player off the market, leaving a baby)Queen surprise shouted: Ana A., come take a look, this is a gift God has given us ah ~King of play: Oh, my God, is indeed a beautiful child, my dear, I think we told him to XX Bar ~Queen Against: No, I think that is called XX to listen better.King of Hand: Well ~ the old rules!Queen and King of finger-guessing game: stone, scissors, cloth!Queen of watching kids jump for joy: Oh, also ~ Dear XX, after your name called XX oh ~ (XX's I sweat ah ~)King announced: To celebrate the old and I come son, I want the world entertained subjects, to ah, put a three days and three nights Liushui Xi!A Financial Executive cried on: Your Majesty, we have to pay!King of a wave, the Financial Executive's dragged off by soldiers.King of meditation-like: it seems light heavyweight figure like please some of the ... ...Voice Over: So, the king and queen were invited to be called "13:00" of the fairy combination to serve the Princess baptism.Fairy 1: I have given little princess and, like me unparalleled beauty! (Voice-over: vomiting ~)Fairy 2: I have given little princess unparalleled wisdom, just like me! (Voice-over: 8 +8 =? Fairy 2 unthinking answer: 27!)Fairy 3: I, I bestowed little princess, none, none, and mouth, eloquence ... ... (narration directly onto plaster paste)Fairy 4: I have given little princess, like me, gentle temperament, oh alive ~ (three-laughs ~)Fairy 5: I have given little princess good heart! (Insidious take drafter, I have my nails nails nail nails I ~)Fairy 6: I have given little princess upright Braveheart! P. Doxey to come visit! (Or on behalf of the moon punishment of sin, can also be ~ The key is action!) (Voice-over: ah, cockroaches ah ~ Fairy 6: The life-saving ah ~ instant run did not affect the ~)Fairy 7: I have never given a small deformation of the Princess's body! (Elephant photos of this walk ~)Fairy 8: I would like to gift a wonderful little princess's voice! (Background voices sounded sawing legs ~)Fairy 9: I have given little princess will never Hua Buwan money! (The king nodded in: or whether this practical point of ~)Fairy 10: I will bless the little princess loved by the people forever!Fairy 11: I will be given a happy little princess!Fairy 12: I want to give our little princess "13 points" combination of logic! Oh, alive ~ (everyone begging like: ... ... ya ma da ... ...)Fairy 13: I would like to gift Little Princess ... ...Voice: are in the final to be a fairy princess gift of a small blessing, when all of a sudden lightning, the world has mutation (abnormal tone, heavy ~)Unknown persons a debut: In order to prevent the world is broken ~ ~ bad (shaking several more ~)Unknown figure 2: In order to safeguard the world and ~ ~ ping (continued shaking ~)1: The words of love and the true evil2: The odious villains in another nasty!One pointed to his: x Witch2 Similarly, pointing to myself: myrmidon children ... ...1 & 2 hug together: we are shuttling in the xyz combination of x! !Do look like a stretched out arm: a black hole, black waiting for us tomorrow!Crows play a small role: that way! Fool ~ fool ~Voice panic: big bad, evil witch appeared!Witch (a finger Tianyi finger, and worked extremely conceited like): such a big surprise, did not invite me to a party in this universe, first jade tree, handsome, suave romantic of the witch? !King: That is because you gently move, so ... ...Witch Hand wave: excuse useless! As we all send a small princess gift, then I also came to send the same bar ~ (Dangdang Dangdang ~ attendant knocked tambourine ing ~) Little Princess is indeed a carefree life, but the 16-year-old birthday, she will be a banana to噎死, Guwahati Ha ha ha ~ ~ ~噎死Bar ~ ~ ~Voice Over: stop-stop, not a spinning wheel to the Zhasi should be do?Witch: Do you have a spinning wheel at home do?Voice Over: Wood there!Witch: What are the age, and change-point pattern bar ~Voice: But ... ...Witch (threats): I say yes噎死is噎死, you again bullshit, I bite you oh ~Voice Kudachoushen like: As a result, the poor Princess was thus hateful witch cursed!Witch cheerful: You are Feng ER I was sand, Chanchanmianmian around the horizon ... ... (exit ~)King and Queen worried about: how do ah? My poor child was surprised to be cursed ... ...Fairy 13: Please do not worry, I have not yet sent it the blessing?King: Then why do you not send it?Fairy 13 timid: because I am busy here hotline ~Queen: Please fairy quickly lift the witch's curse Bar ~Fairy 13: Okay ~ I have given the blessing is this: Little Princess will be 16-year-old birthday was a banana choke, but not dead, but sleeping, until one really loves her prince appeared kiss her, At that time little princess will wake up and live happy forever.King: Why do not suddenly lift the witch's curse do?Fairy 13 hands handshake: Because this is more romantic ah ~Everyone stepped up a while mad: hit you have a tendency to abuse ... ...Voice: violence scenes please ignore the automatic, time-off fast, blink of an eye, Princess Margaret was 16 years old, and she is really beautiful and kind-hearted, family Shizuma good example of Mother ah ~Princess jumping play: I am a girl, beautiful girls ~Pre-emptive half, the latter accounts say ~ looking for someone to go