绿草泱泱
英语简短笑话大全
导语：阅读笑话，为生活创造更多的快乐。以下是我整理的英语简短笑话大全，欢迎各位的阅读与参考。
英语简短笑话【1】
顾客：小心，你的大拇指在我汤里了!
服务员：别担心，先生，不是很烫!
Diner: Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!
Waiter: Don't worry, Sir, it's not that hot!
英语简短笑话【2】
一个服务员给顾客拿来了牛排，大拇指在牛肉上。
“你疯了吗?”顾客喊到，“你的`手在我的牛排上!”
“什么?”服务员说，“你想让它再掉地上?”
A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy?" yelled the customer, "with your hand on my steak?"
"What" answers the waiter, "You want it to fall on the floor again?"
英语简短笑话【3】
服务员：茶或咖啡?先生。
第一个顾客：我要茶
第二个顾客：我也是茶——杯子要干净的!
服务员：两杯茶，哪个要干净的杯子?
Waiter: "Tea or coffee, gentlemen?"
1st customer: "I'll have tea."
2nd customer: "Me, too - and be sure the glass is clean!"
(Waiter exits, returns)
Waiter: "Two teas. Which one asked for the clean glass?"
英语简短笑话【4】
服务员，这只苍蝇在我汤里干什么?
看起来象是在仰泳，先生……
Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?
Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir...
英语简短笑话【5】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
别担心，先生，面包里的蜘蛛会干掉它。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Don't worry sir, the spider on the breadroll will get 'em.
英语简短笑话【6】
服务员，我汤里有只苍蝇!
不是，先生，那是蟑螂，苍蝇在你牛排里。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
No sir, that's a cockroach, the fly is on your steak.
英语简短笑话【7】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
别让别人看见，先生，要不别人都要。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Keep it down sir, or they'll all be wanting one.
英语简短笑话【8】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
我知道，先生，我们没有另收钱。
Waiter, there's a fly in my soup!
Its OK, Sir, there's no extra charge!
英语简短笑话【9】
服务员，汤里有只苍蝇!
对不起，先生，我弄走那三个时忘了这个。
Waiter, there is a fly in my soup!
Sorry sir, maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three.
英语简短笑话【10】
服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇!
是的，先生，是开水杀死了它们。
Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
Yes sir, it's the hot water that kills them.
英语简短笑话【11】
服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇!
1美元你想要什么——活的?
aiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!
What do you expect for $1 - a live one?
英语简短笑话【12】
服务员，汤里有只蜜蜂!
是的，先生，今天苍蝇放假。
Waiter, waiter, there's a bee in my soup.
Yes Sir, it's the fly's day off.
英语简短笑话【13】
服务员，来杯咖啡，不加奶油。
对不起，先生，奶油没了，不加奶怎么样?
Waiter, I'd like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.
I'm sorry, sir, but we're out of cream. How about with no milk?
英语简短笑话【14】
服务员，你的领带在我的汤里了。
没关系，先生，它不缩水。
Waiter, your tie is in my soup!
That's all right, sir, it's not shrinkable.
浮生若梦762
很短的英语小笑话就是用英语表达出来一句有意思的小笑话。
例句：
1、医生问病人是怎么骨折的。病人说，我觉得鞋里有沙子，就扶着电线杆抖鞋。tmd有个混蛋经过那里，以为我触电了，便抄起木棍给了我两棍子。
The doctor asked the patient how the fracture happened. The patient said, I felt there was sand in my shoes, so I shook my shoes by holding the electric pole. TMD an asshole passed by and thought I was electrocuted, so he took a stick and gave me two sticks.
2、生物课上，老师问：“如何才能正确分辨章鱼的手和脚？”学生答：“放个屁给它闻，会捂住鼻子的就是手，其他的就是脚。“全班皆倒。
In biology class, the teacher asked, "how can we correctly distinguish the hands and feet of octopus?" The student replied, "put a fart and smell it. It's the hands that cover the nose and the others are the feet." the whole class fell down.
3、一人上班老是放响屁，同事忍不住说：“你能不能不出声？”然后便见他坐在那抖个不停。同事问他在干什么，他答：“我现在已经调成振动啦！”
A person always farts at work, and his colleagues can't help saying, "can you keep quiet?" Then I saw him sitting there shaking. When his colleague asked him what he was doing, he replied, "I've adjusted to vibration now!"
4、女人一生最喜欢两朵花：一是有钱花，二是尽量花。
Women like two flowers most in their life: one is to spend money, and the other is to spend as much as possible.
5、俗话说：你笑，全世界都跟着你笑；你哭，全世界只有你一个人哭。
As the saying goes: if you laugh, the whole world laughs with you; You cry, you are the only one crying in the world.
