英文短笑话100个

英语笑话带翻译100字

英语笑话带翻译100字一：

Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all of the arithmetic problems in his book easily.One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruit store. There was a sign in the window which said, Apple-Six for five cents. An idea came to Bill and he went into the store.How much are the apples? he asked the store.Six for five cents.But I don't want six apples.How many apples do you want?It is not a question of how many apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic.What do you mean by a problem in arithmetic? asked the man.Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worth four cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples are worth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worth nothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you.Bill picked out a good apple, began to eat it, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprise that he could not say a word.

比尔是一个好学生，也是个聪明的孩子。他喜欢学数学，课本上所有的数学问题他都能不费劲地解答。有一天，在上学路上，比尔经过一家水果店。该店窗户上有个招牌上写着：苹果--五美分六个。比尔脑筋一转，进了店门。苹果怎么卖?五美分六个。但我不想要六个。你想要几个?这不是我想要几个的问题。这是个数学问题。数学问题?你说这话是什么意思?你看，如果六个苹果五美分，那么五个苹果四美分，四个苹果三美分，三个苹果二美分，二个苹果一美分，一个苹果就不要钱。我只要一个苹果，如果一个苹果一分钱也不要的话，那我也就没必要给你钱了。比尔拣了一个好苹果，开始吃了起来，然后兴高采烈地迈出了店门。那个售货员吃惊地望着这个小男孩，一句话也说不出来。

英语笑话带翻译100字二：

On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

在一个乡村路上，一警察让这个农民靠边停车，说：“先生，你意识到你的妻子在几公里前从车上掉下去了吗?”农民回答说：“感谢上帝，我还以为我聋了呢!”

英语笑话带翻译100字三：

A young couple was becoming anxious about their four-year-old son, who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists, but the doctors found nothing wrong with him.Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted, "Mom, the toast is burned.""You talked! You talked!" shouted his mother. "I'm so happy! But why has it taken this long.""Well, up till now," said the boy, "things have been okay."

一对年轻的'夫妇对于他们四岁的儿子仍然不会说话这件事非常着急。他们带他去看专家，但是医生们找不出任何不正常的地方。之后有一天早上，这个男孩突然说道：“妈妈，面包拷糊了。”“你说话了!你说话了!”他的妈妈嚷道。“我真高兴!但是为什么要我们等这么长的时间呢?”“嗯，直到现在，”男孩说，“每件事都很正常啊。”

I am the Driver The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn't let him aboard. "It's too crowded," they shouted. "What do you think you are?" "I'm the driver," he said. 我是司机 一辆公共汽车已经相当拥挤，还有一个人想挤进来，乘客不让他上去。 “太挤了，”他们喊道，“你以为你是谁？” “我是司机。”他回答说。I'll See to the RestA guard was about to signal his train to start when he saw an attractive girl standing on the platform by an open door, talking to another pretty girl inside the carriage."Come on, miss!" he shouted. "Shut the door, please!""Oh, I just want to kiss my sister goodbye," she called back."You just shut that door, please," called the guard, "and I'll see to the rest."其余的事由我负责一位车上的列车员刚发出信号让火车启动，这时他看见一位很漂亮的姑娘站在站台上一节打开的车厢门旁边，跟车厢里另一位漂亮姑娘在说话。“快点，小姐!”他喊道：“请把门关上。”“噢，我还没有和妹妹吻别呢。”她回答道。“请把门关上好了，”列车员说：“其余的事由我负责。”Sleeping PillsBob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills.Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the office, strolled in and said to his boss: "I didn't have a bit of trouble getting up this morning.""That's fine," roared the boss, "but where were you Monday and Tuesday?"安眠药鲍勃晚上失眠。他去看医生，医生给他开了一些强力安眠药。星期天晚上鲍勃吃了药，睡得很好，在闹钟响之前就醒了过来。他到了办公室，遛达进去，对老板说：“我今天早上起床一点麻烦都没有。”“好啊!”老板吼道，“那你星期一和星期二到哪儿去了？”

能笑死人的英文笑话如下：i am an angel, and the reason why i can not go back to heaven is the problem of my weight.

He owes my uncle 100dolar.他欠我叔叔100美元although you wear some cologne, i can still vaguely smell a scummy whiff out of you.

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.

Anger begins with folly, and ends in repentance。愤怒以愚蠢开始,以后悔告终。To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.There is no royal road to learning。求知无坦途。

英语笑话带翻译 举例如下：

英语短笑话大全带翻译一：

Unexpected guests were on the way, and my mother, an impeccable housekeeper, rushed around straightening up.

She put my father and brother to work cleaning the guest bathroom. Later, when she went to inspect it, she was surprised that the once-cluttered room had been tidied up so quickly. Then she saw the note on the closed shower curtains. It read "Thank you for not looking in the bathtub."

不速之客就在路上，我妈妈，一个完美的`家庭主妇，正忙里忙外地整理。她分配给我爸和我哥哥的任务是打扫供客人使用的浴室。

一会儿之后，当她去检查的时候，她吃惊了，曾经一度杂乱的房间瞬间就被打扫干净了。接着她看到浴帘上有一张纸条，纸条上写着：“谢谢你没往浴缸里看。”

英语短笑话大全带翻译二：A preacher is buying a parrot 传教士买鹦鹉

A preacher is buying a parrot

Are you sure it doesnt scream, yell, or swear? asked the preacher.

Oh absolutely. Its a religious parrot, the storekeeper assures him.

Do you see those strings on his legs? When you pull the right one, he recites the lords prayer, and when you pull on the left he recites the 23rd Psalm.

Wonderful! says the preacher, but what happens if you pull both strings?

I fall off my perch, you stupid fool! screeched the parrot.

一个传教士在买鹦鹉

“你确信它不会尖叫，大叫或诅咒别人吗?”传教士问。

“哦，绝对不会。它是一只虔诚的鹦鹉。”店主保证说。

“你看见它腿上的这些细绳了吗?当你拉动右面的这根，它会背诵天主经，当你拉动左面的那根，它会背诵赞美诗”

“太棒了!”传教士说，“但是如果我同时拉动两条绳子，会发生什么呢?”

“我会从树干上掉下去的，你这个笨蛋!”鹦鹉尖声说道。

英语短笑话大全带翻译三：吝啬鬼的聚会

The Mean Mans Party

The notorious cheap skate finally decided to have a party. Explaining to a friend how to find his apartment, he said, "Come up to the fifth floor and ring the doorbell with your elbow. When the door open, push with your foot."

"Why use my elbow and foot?"

"Well, gosh," was the reply, "You're not coming empty-handed, are you?"

吝啬鬼的聚会

一个声名狼藉的小气鬼终于决定要请一次客了。他在向一个朋友解释怎么找到他家时说：“你上到五楼，用你的胳膊肘按门铃。门开了后，再用你的脚把门推开。”

“为什么我要用我的肘和脚呢?”

“天哪!” 吝啬鬼回答，“你总不会空着手来吧?”