武汉碧海蓝天
剧本主要是由台词和舞台指示组成的，是戏剧艺术创作的文本基础，编导与演员演出的依据。与剧本类似的词汇还包括脚本、剧作等等。它是以代言体方式为主，表现故事情节的文学样式。剧本主要分为文学剧本与摄影剧本。
Three Times’ Beating Monster
人物：T唐僧S:孙悟空 E:猪八戒
J:沙僧
B:白骨精（何平） B1:B变成的村姑 B2:B变成的太婆B3:B变化成的老头
T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?
S: Bajie,map!
E: （摸出，递给S）
S: Look,boss （凑近T）……（T、S一齐转向E）
T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, don’t bring these pictures of beautiful girls!
E: Oh, boss!Forgive me（伸手拿回）
T: （缩手）I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west
E: But……
T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?
E: （递）Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!（坐）My stomach doesn’t allow So.
S: Fat Pig!
E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……
S: You will what（凶相）？
E: （软禁）I will help you catch fleas（跳蚤）。
S: Hm!
T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?
E: You see , boss is hungry,too!
T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!
J: But boss,if a monster comes while brother monkey is away……
T: Em……It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?
S: No problem!（安装）（B已躲在一旁偷看）
J: This is……？
S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from boss’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!
T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!
S: Bye!（走）
T: Let’s play cards!（三人开始打牌）音乐《斗地主》
B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.（变成B1）
B1: （接近三人，望着）Can I join you?
J: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against landowner and three people are enough.
B1: （在一旁观看）Oh,Chance! Bomb!
T: Bomb?（打出）
B1: Double King!
T: Oh…I win! Em……，Lady,you are a boss-hand. Come in and teach me!（准备开电网门）
S: （回来，看见B1）Oh,monster!（上前就打）
B1: （倒）Ah……
T: （气愤）Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!
S: She is a monster!
T: Nonsense!（深呼吸）
S: Oh,please don’t……
T:It’s too late!（唱）Once more……you open the door…（泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱）
S: Please,Please,oh,no……（痛苦抱头）
T: （呛住，咳）Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!
B: （真身出现）Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!（变成太婆）
B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?
T: Daughter?…（连忙挡住地尸体）No,sorry!（陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡）
S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!（S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2）
E&J: Are you Ok, boss?（扶T）
J: Look,（伸食指）how many?
T:Two……（晕乎乎地）Sun Wukong, game over!（变成B3）
B3: （看到B1,B2尸体）Oh…，my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!!（哭喊）
S: I’ll kill you, monster!（打）
T: （想阻止，未及）You,you……（险些晕，E,J扶住 ）You have killed three lives!
S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!
T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!!
S: （悲，离去）（音乐，营造 "假"悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》
J: boss, brother Monkey is……
T: Dont mention that guy any more!
B: （出现） Ha,ha,ha!（三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后"飘"走）
T: （惊）You are……
B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!（E,J去阻斗，被击退）
B: （抓住T）Ill enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha……
S: （悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕）A thousand years later.
T: Wukong?
E: Oh,Brother Monkey!
J: Our hero is back!
T: I,I cant understand……What happened?
S: Boss,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!
T: How,how did you find out?
S: （沉默）……Monkeys intuition（直觉）
T: Wukong（S不理T）I admit my mistake this time（S仍不理）Im sorry（小声）
S: What?
T: Im sorry.
S: Em? Louder,please?
T: I……am……sorry……（S 捂耳）（音乐响）《敢问路在何方》（这个放伴奏）
（谢幕）
A Play:
Buying Medicine
By Liu Qinglin
Characters: X ------ Xiao Fei
S ------- Shopkeeper
D- ---- Doctor Li
O- -----Others （ O1, O2 O3 -----）
Ws ------ Wounded soldiers （ W1, W2,W3 -----）
H -----He zhenwu, a Japanese spy
W- ---- Woman
J ------ Japanese
Scene1
（ At an old temple lie some wounded soldiers. D is examining their wounds.）
D: Good evening, everyone.
Ws: （ Together） Good evening, Dr Li.
D: Hello, let me examine you.
W1: I’m all right. There’s no need to do so. （ W1 is about to fall down.）
D: （Helps him up） Your leg discloses you! Let me have a look. Ah, it’s going worse. Let me put some
medicine on you.
W1: No, it isn’t necessary. There is little medicine left. Go to look after that young man. He has a high
fever. He seems fainted.
D: （ Takes W2’s temperature. ） So he has! He needs an injection but we have none. Feed him these last three pills with warm water. What else can I do? There’s no medicine left.
W3: Don’t worry, Doctor. I am young and strong. I am all tight now. I’ll go and buy some medicine.
D: No, you are not all right. Your leg will bleed when you move. Lie down and have a good rest.
W4: So you can let me go . I can run very fast. The enemy cannot catch me.
（ Just then, Xiao Fei comes in.）
X: Be quiet everybody. You must have a good rest. This is order, you know.
W1: But there’s no medicine left.
X: That’s why I’m here. I’ve come to fetch the list . I’ll go to town to buy medicine.
D: Have you got any money?
X: No.
D: （ Takes off her gold ring.） Take this with you. Perhaps you can change it for medicine.
X: No, I can’t take it , because it is given to you by your future husband who gave up his life to the revolution a few days ago. It mustn’t go to other people’s hands.
D: But how can you get the medicine without money?
X: Don’t worry. I’ll manage. Goodbye.
D and Ws: Be careful!
Scene2
（ Music） （ Xiao is walking on the way like a businessman. He sings as he goes.
When he Passes a corn field, he sees He Zhenwu the Japanese spy robbing a woman）
W: Help! Help!
H: You needn’t cry. There’s nobody else here. Let me marry you and make yourself noble.
W: You Japanese spy! No one will marry you.
H: Otherwise I’ll kill you! （ He raises his gun and the woman catches hold of his wrist . They start a fight. Finally, H knocks W down. Just then X arrives）
X: Stop! Don’t bully Chinese woman!
H: It’s none of your business! Go away.
X: I would rather stop you. （ H raises his gun towards X. X kicks it away. They begin a fight. W puts on his clothes W and begins to pull H’s leg. X knocks H down）
X: （To W） Quick! Help me tie him up.
W: You are bleeding. Let me do first aid.
X: It doesn’t matter. Pull him into the corn fields.
H: Please spare my life. I won’t do that again
（ W takes up the gun and is about to shoot.）
X: Don’t do that. If the Japanese hear the shot, they’ll come.
H: Thank you, sir. But please let me go.
X: Let you go? You’ll continue to kill and bully Chinese! （ X puts his socks into H’s mouth.） Wait here . And lend me your pass and bike. Don’t try to run away. （They go down.）
Scene 3
（Music） （X is riding a bike toward town. He sings as he goes along）
J1 and J2: Stop! Show me your pass.
X: Here you are!
J1 & J2: （ After reading it.） Hi! Salute. （ They Salute.） （ X goes through the town gate and after some time stops at a drug shop and knocks at the door.）
S: Who’s it?
X: It’s me, a customer.
S: （To O1） Go to answer the door.
O1: come in, please. You are the only customer for these days.
S: What can I do far you?
X: （ Hands him the pass.） We Japanese assistant soldier need some medicine. Here is the list.
S: Oh, so much medicine! Do you have enough money?
X: We’ll send you the money in a few days’ time. Quick, this is order. （ Shows him his gun.）
S: All right! All right!
S: （ To O1） Quick! Give him the medicine
O1: All right . （ Hands it to X.） Here you are.
X: I have to go now. Bye-bye.
S: （ To O1） Quick! Close the door.
O1: All right. （ He closes it.）
S: （ Makes a telephone call.） Hi! This is No1 Medicine Shop. Just now, a man came in and took a lot of medicine away. Perhaps he belongs to the Eighth Route Army . Stop him, quick!
（ X rides his bike fast. Soon he arrives at the gate, J1 is receiving a phone call. J2 signs him to stop. X rides towards him and knocks him out. J1 begins to short at him. Soon he arrives at a bridge, where two soldiers stand . X kills them with two shots. A crowd of soldiers rush towards him. He run into the corn field. H has just frees himself and is about to leave.）
J3: Oh, here he is!
js: （Together） Don’t move! Hands up!
H: I’m sorry. I’m not Eighth -----
J4: Tie him up. （ They tie him up and beat him.）
H: Ouch! I belong to Japanese army.
J5: Don’t listen to him. He’s lying. Put him in our car. Let’s go. （They go down.）
X: （X goes through the corn field and comes up to a street. He meets some Japanese and fights them. He kills some of them and enters a lane. Finally he arrives at the temple. D and Ws come to welcome him）
D: Here comes our hero.
Ws: Congratulations.
X: Thank you, everybody.
（ The end ）
L:梁山伯 Z:祝英台 M:马文才 旁：旁白
旁：话说梁山伯和祝英台三年前一同来到刚刚成立的武汉新东方书院学习英语。梁山伯酷爱口语师从口语老师邓大付学习美国口语，尤其擅长模仿马丁？路德？金的演讲。（旁白暂停，邓英文"I have a dream "）。祝英台一心梦想出国，梦想有朝一日成为BBC主持人（旁白暂停，祝英文"this is BBC…）最终祝英台以托福和GRE高分的成绩被哥伦比亚大学录取。在祝英台临走的那一天，梁山伯十八里相送在天河机场与祝英台缠绵告别。
L: Yingtai ,I love you so much and I’ll miss you so much.!
Z: I love you, too! Don’t worry. Shanbo I only love you in this wild world. I’ll marry you as soon as I’m back. Wait for me just for two years.
L: I’ll kiss you across the Pacific Ocean.
Z: I’ll kiss you from the other side. Wait for me. BoBo
旁：一周以后，祝英台从美国打来越洋电话。
L: Oh, Sweetie, Yintai I miss you so much, miss you every minute every second. Oh my dear. Are you listening to me?
Z: Listen, Liang Shanbo. I’m calling to tell you that I loved you. But I think you’d better find a better girl.
L: What? Pardon?
Z: Because I’ll get married.
L: Married ? to who?
Z: To 英俊潇洒风流倜傥玉树临风的.Ma Wencai He is so handsome. So rich, even richer than Yu Minhong. And he is good at 葵花宝典。I love his money and I love his body.
L: What are you talking about? You wait and see. I’ll give you some color to see see. I’ll kill you! I will kill you in America!
Z: America? You can come to America? Hahahaha
旁：祝英台的无端背叛深深伤害了梁山伯脆弱的心灵，他发下毒誓：不杀祝英台誓不为人。于是重新来到新东方书院学习托福和GRE.当然他没有忘记用老生证可以优惠20块钱。为了能飞越重洋去杀掉祝英台，他每天提醒自己有一个梦想。I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.
I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and lives out the true meaning of its creed:We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all men are created equal. I have a dream that one day I will kill Zhu Yingtai right in America. It is a dream that deeply rooted in my heart. In my heart.
旁：一年之后，梁山伯也来到了美国，四处寻找祝英台的下落。终于在纽约街头找到他当年的爱人祝英台，而她正和马文才卿卿我我。
L: Zhu Yingtai, long time no see, huh? Who am I ? I’m Liang Shanbo. I’m here to kill you.
Z: Liang…shanbo. Oh, Wencai. He is crazy. He will kill me.
M: You! Get out of here.
L: You! Get out of here!
M: 电话来了。Hello, I’m in wuhan. Ok ok I’ll come right now
Z: Please don’t go. Just stay, please. He’ll kill me.
M: I know! But if I stay, he’ll kill me by the way
Z: You told me you were good at 葵花宝典？
M: Sorry, I’m not good at 葵花宝典。 I’m just good at 新华字典。
Z: Oh, you liar. Just get out of here!! （to Liang Shanbo） Oh, darling, you must kill me?
L: Yes, I have to. Because I hate you more than I can say.
Z: （sing）When we were young, we listened to the MP3, you said you’d love me forever. Don’t kill me, ok? Shanbo. I qiu qiu ni
L: No door! （sing） Where you go, whatever you say, I’ll be right here killing you. I only know I was born to love you or to kill you. Now I can’t love you, the only choice is to kill you.
Z: 曾经Once upon a time, there was a true love in front of me, I didn’t cherish it. If I was to meet him again, I wish to say I love you. If you would ask me how long I would love him, I should say ten thousand years. That man is you The only man I love in this wild world is you. Only you.（sing）
L: The only woman I want to kill is on-ly you!!
Z: Please, you know I love you. I love you just like laoshu ai dami. I want to marry you.
L: hehehe Really?
Z: Oh, of course. Please don’t kill me!!!!
L: To kill or not to kill is a question. I don’t know. Who can tell me? I put her life in your hands. Everybody here, please tell me kill or not kill?
（to kill）
L: You hear this. I ‘m sorry. But don’t worry , I’ll go to heaven together with you.
Z: All right kill me, then we’ll become two butterflies in the beautiful garden（sing）
（sing）
Z: 亲爱的你别杀我，杀了我你也没有好结果
L:亲爱的我也不想杀 可是大家非得要我杀
小倩TINA
Three visits to the cottage 主要人物：诸葛亮、诸葛家仆人（朱不亮）、刘备、关羽、张飞、旁白（同时操作电脑） 旁白： Three visits to the cottage（中文名三顾茅庐） is a story from one of the Four Great classical Chinese novels——the Three Kindoms. ZhuGeliang is one of the main characters in the original. Also, he is an outstanding militarist, politician and the symbol of the wisdom in Chinese history. Another main actors——Liubei, who visited ZhuGeliang's thatched cottage three times and wanted to invite him to be his military adviser. Finally, ZhuGeliang was moved by Liubei' sincerity, helped the three brothers——Liubei, Guanyu and Zhangfei to establish the Shu Kindom. Now，let’s go into the story. 第一幕 屋子中，诸葛亮在屋里走着， 诸葛亮：Buliang，this classroom is so dirty，猪不亮扫地，送水（营养快线） 三兄弟上场，关羽（头巾），刘备（墨镜），张飞（不停打嗝） 刘：饭后一支烟，赛过活神仙 A cigerate after dinner plays an important role in my life.（伸手，张飞点烟，刘深吸一口，长舒一口气） 刘：嗯？没点着 En? It dosen’t burn on. 张飞：凑合着吧，老师不让抽烟 Sorry，we can only has this.We can’t smoke in the classroom! 关羽：此番前来，定要邀请的卧龙先生 We must invite Mr.Zhu Geliang! 张飞：必须的，老曹太欺负人了 Certainly,Mr.Cao bully us too much. 三人来到门前，石头剪子布 刘备：According to our custom？ 关羽：OK. 张飞：No problem. 刘备三人进行石头剪子布，刘备输了，其余两人把刘备推到前面。 刘备作出一幅英勇就义的姿态，（上海滩响起） 刘备作按门铃状，（门铃声响起）。 诸葛亮：Bu liang（不亮）, go to open the door. 仆人：Heng!(哼) 仆人板着个脸到了门口，做了一个甩头的动作，并呼啦呼啦头发，然后深呼吸，放平稳，保持微笑。然后打开门，举了个躬。 仆人：안녕하세요(发音a ni ha sai yao~~~，中文意思：你好) 刘备：Can you speak English? 关羽：（紧接着刘备）Can you speak Chinese? 张飞：（紧接着）Can you speak Japanese? 历史老照片不能说的秘密慈禧军阀明末清初文革晚清刘备：（紧接着）Spanish? 关羽：（紧接着）Congolese? 张飞：（紧接着）Egyptian? 仆人：（紧接着）Shut up! Who are you people? 刘备：(摆个pose)I’m Liubei. 关羽：(也摆个pose)I’m Guanyu. 张飞：(同样摆个pose，把关羽碰倒了)I’m Sorry. 刘备三人赶紧把仆人扶起来。 猪不亮：你们怎么来的啊 What do you three take to come here? 张飞：骑马来的啊，做骑马状 Riding a horse ,of course. 猪不亮：那你们怎么骑马来的啊？ So,How do you riding a horse? 三人面面相觑，猪不亮关门 刘备突然明白了，“money！！” 张飞关羽耸肩都没带钱，下台 第二幕 三兄弟上台，张飞关羽手提礼品 关羽猥琐的说:这次应该可以了吧，上次也怨我们 I think we’ll manage it this time. 张飞：啥啊，如果你不是拉着我，老子一嗓子吼死他（做咆哮状，老虎声音） What? If you don’t pull me,I will easily kill him with my strong throat! 刘备：行了，行了，我们来干啥来了 稍息。。。立正。。。（张飞关羽照做） Stop,stop,What are we doing here? At ease!—Attention! 刘备：都给我机灵点（张飞关羽点头答应） You three! Be clever this time! 屋子中„„ （英文歌，诸葛亮和猪不亮正喝酒，猪不亮哼着英语歌，他两个喝醉了） 诸葛亮：MY GOD！！上天你为什么这么惩罚我 My God!! Why do you punish me?! 猪不亮：老大别难过，班长杨超不也没过吗 Don’t be sad,my boss. As I know,our monitor does’t pass the examination. 诸葛亮：我的四级考试啊，开始哭．．． What？our monitor does’t pass the examination？But，My English cet band 4 also losed··· （换背景音乐，猪不亮跟着哭，门铃响，猪不亮醉醺醺的摇摇晃晃去开门） 猪不亮：谁啊 Who’s this? 张飞：收水费的 I come here to charge the bill of electricity （开门，三人一脸嬉笑） 刘备：我们又来了，麻烦小弟通报一下 We are here again,bother to notice your boss. （猪不亮四下环顾，把礼品接过来了） （屋子里传来悲伤的气息，张飞和关羽抹眼泪） 张飞：怎么突然一阵感伤涌上心头（自言自语） I just feel some feeling of sorrow in my heart.. 关羽：请问卧龙先生在家吗，我们想见一下（SEE） Is Mr Zhu Ge home? We want to have a talk with him ,please. 猪不亮：吟诗，见与不见。。。 （你见，或者不见我 It’s doesn’t matter if you see me or not 我就在那里 I am standing right there 不悲不喜 With no emotion 你念，或者不念我 It’s doesn’t matter if you miss me or not 情就在那里 The feeling is right there 不来不去 And it isn’t going anywhere 你爱或者不爱我 It’s doesn’t matter） （猪不亮转身关门，站不稳） 刘：What?！！ 张飞：是不是家里死人了，下次再来吧 I’m afraid some-one important of him died here. Let’s go. Maybe we should come next time. 关羽：希望死的不是诸葛亮 Oh, I wish Zhu Geliang does’t die„ （关羽，刘备打张飞，下台。。） 第三幕 （诸葛亮和猪不亮玩三国杀，背景音乐，术语） （诸葛亮又赢了） 猪不亮：老大你真NB You are the man ! 诸葛亮：那是，你不想想我是干什么的，我打算过了年就去找刘备，找份工作 Hum！That’s a piece of cake. And I think I should go to Liu Bei’s corporation to find a job after Spring Festival. 猪不亮：你想去刘备那里？？ What? You said you wanna to go to Liu Bei’s company? 诸葛亮：嗯，那里用不着英语 En...That’s a good place in which I need not speak English. 猪不亮：前几天他来过了，让我赶跑了 But...uh, I drove him away a few days ago. 门铃响。。 猪不亮：说来就来了 Speak of the devil and he doth appear. （三兄弟，大跨步的走进来，诸葛亮一见到很激动） 诸葛亮：大哥，想死我了（拥抱）你带我走吧 Boss! I ached for you so much, please help me! 刘备：镇定镇定，既然兄弟这么看得起我，那咱们就一起大干一场吧 Be calm. Since you trust me so much, let’s go and do it! （出发。。） 诸葛亮：大哥等等，那。。那，一月多少钱啊 Wait,wait...My boss, uh, how much will.. I get.. from you then. 张飞：（恐吓状）兄弟之间不谈钱，谈钱多伤感情，（拎着诸葛亮就走） It hurts feelings when it comes to money! （猪不亮在后面拿着包袱，大喊） 猪不亮：带上我吧，（走路（小沈阳状）） Oh, Please take me away. 闭幕。。。。
红豆呱呱
顾客：小心，你的大拇指在我汤里了服务员：别担心，先生，不是很烫！A : Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!B: Don't worry Sir it's not that hot! 一个服务员给顾客拿来了牛排，大拇指在牛肉上。“你疯了吗？”顾客喊到，“你的手在我的牛排上！”“什么？”服务员说，“你想让它再掉地上？”A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.A:Are you crazy?( yelled the customer ),with your hand on my steak?(What answers the waiter) You want it to fall on the floor again? 服务员：茶或咖啡？先生。第一个顾客：我要茶第二个顾客：我也是茶——杯子要干净的！服务员：两杯茶，哪个要干净的杯子？B:(Waiter:) Tea or coffee gentlemen?A:I'll have tea.C:(2nd customer:) Me too - and be sure the glass is clean!(Waiter exits returns)B:(Waiter:) Two teas. Which one asked for the clean glass?创新句子：我坚持用干净杯子喝茶。服务员，这只苍蝇在我汤里干什么？看起来象是在仰泳，A:Waiter what's this fly doing in my soup?Um looks to me to be backstroke sir...服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！别担心，先生，面包里的蜘蛛会干掉它。A:Waiter there's a fly in my soup!B:Don't worry sir the spider on the breadroll will get 'em. 服务员，我汤里有只苍蝇！不是，先生，那是蟑螂，苍蝇在你牛排里。A:Waiter there's a fly in my soup!C:No sir that's a cockroach the fly is on your steak. 服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！别让别人看见，先生，要不别人都要。A:Waiter there's a fly in my soup!B:Keep it down sir or they'll all be wanting one.服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！我知道，先生，我们没有另收钱。A:Waiter there's a fly in my soup!C:Its OK Sir there's no extra charge!服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！对不起，先生，我弄走那三个时忘了这个。A:Waiter there is a fly in my soup!B:Sorry sir maybe I've forgotten it when I removed the other three.服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇！是的，先生，是开水杀死了它们。A:Waiter there's a dead fly in my soup!C:Yes sir it's the hot water that kills them. 话剧前半部分是荆珂刺秦王搞笑英语话剧剧本 （Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）： Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众） I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister? 阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming. 太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”! 阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~ （作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！这句话要跟观众交流，最好由观众来回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world. 太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK. I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁Are you challenging me? 荆轲Off course! 耸耸肩表示同意李莫愁Come on!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。。。。”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?荆轲: We don\'t need any reason to win a person. Don\'t we? Do we? （赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）李莫愁：Momma always said: \"Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you\'re gonna get.\" I got it, Momma is right. 荆轲再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you? 荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”? 荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 羊肉串和纳税人（英文小品） Characters: Mr. Shi, Xiaofu, Dabao Mr. Shi: Tax is the major source of the fiscal revenue. There is an evident change about the relationship between the tax collector and taxpayer in the past 20 years. Now, the tax collector, Xiaofu, and the tax payer Dabao, a vendor selling Yangrouchuan will show you the very change. The first Act happened in 1980s. Act I (in Bazaar of Beijing, sanlihe, 1980s) Dabao: Yangrouchuan , yangrouchuan, eaten one ,want nine, eaten one, want nine. Hi, Take my yangrouchuan.(slipped, take it up, ) Xiaofu: Tax! Pay the tax! Dabao: (change faces) Taxi? Where is the taxi? Here’s no taxi. Xiaofu: Tax! T---A ---X! Dabao: What’s the tax? I just know taxi! Do you want me to call a taxi for you? Taxi----! Taxi----! Xiaofu: Enough! Are you the vendor? Dabao: No , No, No, no! I 'm just have a look. The vendor has gone to the toilet. Xiaofu: Not the vendor ? Impossible! you 've been here for 2 hours. Dabao: Really ? (Xiaofu: Yes, of course.) How do you know it? Xiaofu: The window of my office is open to here and I 've been looking at you for two hours. Dabao: It’s a big bug! Xiaofu: Oh. Don’t waste my time! Please pay the tax---- 10 Yuan! Dabao: 10 yuan?! My god. I had just earned 20 Yuan one day! 5 Yuan, ok? Xiaofu: Don't cheat me, you've sold more than 2 hundred ones. Dabao: 6yuan, my dear sisiter. 7Yuan, my lovely beauty. Dabao: Not for you ,not for me, let's split the difference. 8 yuan ,ok ? Xiaofu: (looking around) All right ,a deal. But no receipt. (Dabao payed 8 yuan and Xiaofu left) Dabao: What a smart woman! Bad luck! I’m bankrupt. I have to change my place. Hope I would not meet her any more! Let’s go! Act II Mr. Shi: The next scene happened in new century. China had been marching in the way of the market economy for twenty years more, in the new era of building the well-off society in an all-round way, how do the vendor regard tax as and how is the tax collected? The scene will tell you. Let’s enjoy it! (In the market; Dabao in white clothes ,a board with "NO SARS") Dabao:: Yangrouchuan, yangrouchuan. Eaten one, want nine. Eaten one, want nine. Xiaofu: Hi, Dabao: Hi. Two: What a familiar face. Two: It’s you! Dabao: 10 years past, you are a still a tax collector. Xiaofu: 10 years past, you still sell Yangrouchuan. How is your business? Dabao: Everything is OK! 10 years past, you are still beautiful lady in Sanlihe of Beijing. Xiaofu: 10 years past, you and your Yangrouchuan look more clean than 20 years before. Dabao: Thank you. No SARS, no dirtiness; Serve people, serve me. Xiaofu: Great! Have you…… Dabao: Married? I ‘m not married; I’m still single. Xiaofu: Have you claimed your tax this month? Dabao: What? Taxi? Oh, tax! Of course. I should pay the tax of 50 Yuan this month and I have claimed at the begin of this month. Xioafu: Your receipt, please. Dabao: (shows the receipt ) Here you are, I have paid my tax in the tax service center by computer. Xiaofu: Great! What a good taxpayer you are. Dabao: Thank you. It is my duty. I’m proud of myself to pay the tax for our country. Xiaofu: Yeah! The tax you paid is a share of our country’s economy, and you do a lot for Olympics of Beijing! Dabao: Let’s do it together! . It’s said that, Don't ask what your country can do for you but ask what you can do for your country. Just like me, sell Yangrouchuan, and pay the Tax for ten years more. Xiaofu: You 're the loveliest people in new century! Dabao: Thank you! And you 're the loveliest tax collector in new era! X: Excuse me, and I have to go now. Bye-bye. D: A moment, are you free tomorrow evening? Could I have a dinner with you? Xiaofu: Well, may I have the company of my husband? Dabao: No, no, no problem. 6 o’clock in the evening, Beichuanyuan, ok? Xiaofu: just a kidding. I have to go home now.(leaves) Dabao, See you tomorrow. Dabao: Hope to see you everyday. The End
Shiro白小白
Little Red Riding Hood 小红帽 第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家 Mum： (妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里） Little Red Riding Hood 唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing? Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma. Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok! Mum： （亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说） Be good. Be careful. Little Red Riding Hood： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy. Mum： Bye-bye. Darling. 第二场：在路上 (一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁) Little Red Riding Hood： Wow！Flowers, how beautiful! （放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers. Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf. I am hungry. (做找东西状,东张西望) Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going? (做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼) Little Red Riding Hood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)To Grandma’s．Grandma is ill. Wolf：（自言自语）I’ ll eat Grandma. But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look! 6 little baby ducks. Little Red Riding Hood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞) Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后） Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby ducks，how are you? Six Ducks：We’ re fine．Thank you． Where are you going? Little Red Riding Hood：To Grandma’s．Oh, I must go, bye. Six Ducks：Goodbye． 第三场：Grandma家 Grandma： （喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。） Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now. (做找寻的样子)Where is Grandma’ s house? (高兴地对观众说)Aha , it’s here.(敲门)Bang, Bang, Bang． Grandma： Who is it？ Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’s me. Little Red Riding Hood. Grandma： (边说边起床) Come in, come in. Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边) Grandma , I’ll eat you. Grandma： （惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上） 灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。 Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy！I’ll sleep. Little Red Riding Hood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma． Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音) Who is it？ Little Red Riding Hood：It’s me。Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise! Wolf：Come in， Come in. Little Red Riding Hood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh! What are big ears! Wolf：I can listen to your sweet voice. Little Red Riding Hood：Wow! What a big eyes! Wolf：I can see you pretty face. Little Red Riding Hood：Oh! What a big hand. Wolf：I can hug you. Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look! What a big hands? Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)I can eat you! Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No! No! Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’s delicious. I still sleep. I like sleeping. Hunter： (一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’s the wolf? Look! A door．(推门)The wolf is sleeping. Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声) Hunter： (端起枪想打，又放下)What a big stomach! (摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry．(从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起) Look! Scissors. (做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, cut. Little Red Riding Hood/Grandma：Thank you． Hunter： Grandma ,give me some needles and thread． Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones． Grandma： (从桌子上拿来针线) Little Red Riding Hood：(搬来几个石头)One, two, three. Hunter： (把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里) Grandma： I’ll thread it. Hunter： (拿起枪)Woke up! Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)My stomach is so heavy. Hunter： You big bad wolf, raise your arms! Wolf：(边跑边说) Help! Don’t shot me! Hunter： （开枪）Bang, bang! Wolf： (应声倒下) Hunter： The bad wolf is dead． Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah! Thank you． Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you 《白雪公主》英语小剧本白雪公主 SNOW WHITE CONTENTS SW-白雪公主 Q-皇后 M-魔镜 H-猎人 P-白马王子 D-小矮人 A-小动物 音乐起，旁白 A long time ago, In a beautiful kingdom, there lived a young king and queen, the people loved them so much; the queen died while giving birth to a girl, her name was Snow White, She was a beautiful princess. Year passed, the king got married again, The people didn’t love the new queen, because she was cruel. One day, In the king’s palace: 白雪出场 S.w: My name is S.w , I am a beautiful princess, I miss my mother so much, Where is my mother? Where is my mother? 音乐起，皇后、魔镜出场 Q: I am a queen, I’m very beautiful,Where is Mirror? Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who’s the most beautiful? M: S.w is much more beautiful than you! Q: Hunter, go kill S.w. 猎人出场 H: Yes, my queen 音乐起，小动物出场，追赶猎人，公主惊慌出逃 S.w: Help me ,help me, please, please A: what’s the matter with you? S.w: The hunter…hunter… A: bite you bite you … 小动物追赶猎人下场 S.w: I am tried and hungry, oh, there is a little house , I will eat a little and lie down. 音乐起，7个小矮人出场， D: 1\Look, somebody ate my food 2\somebody drank my water 3\someone is sleeping now 4\What a beautiful girl! 小矮人睡觉音乐起公主先醒了小矮人醒了对话 5\How do you do? S.w: How do you do? My name is S.w … Nice to meet you! D: （齐说）Nice to meet you ,too 6\ welcome to our house! 7\Would you like to live here? S.w: My pleasure, thank you very much! D: Let’s go out for our work, bye-bye, S.W 皇后、魔镜出场 Q: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the most beautiful? M: S.w is much more beautiful than you! Q: What? S.w is not dead? Hahaha, I got a good idea! 音乐起，皇后扮演老太太出场，对话 Q: Apple ,apple, beautiful apple, S.w: Hello, Good morning grandma! Q: pretty girl ,would you like a bite? S.w: Oh, yes ,thank you grandma! 白雪公主咬一口后倒地 Q: The girl is dead! Hahaha… 小矮人出场、围着公主哭 S.w wake up, wake up… 音乐起，动物引着王子出场 P: A beautiful girl! She shall be my queen! 王子吻公主，公主醒了 S.w: Thank you for your help! P: My pleasure 音乐起，小动物、小矮人、公主、王子跳起欢快的舞
