huayingxiong6
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面我为大家带来幽默风趣英语小故事三则，欢迎大家阅读!
幽默风趣英语小故事：恭喜
"I'd like you to come right over," a man phoned an undertaker(承办人), " and supervise the burial of my poor, departed wife."
"Your wife!" gasped the undertaker, "Didn't I bury her two years ago?"
"You don't understand," said the man, "You see I married again."
"Oh," said the undertaker, "Congratulations!"
一位男子给殡仪馆老板打电话：“我希望你能来我这里主持我可怜的妻子的葬礼。”
老板吃力地说：“你的妻子!我在两年前没有埋葬她吗?”
男子说：“你不知道，我又结婚了”
“噢”， 老板说，“恭喜恭喜!”
幽默风趣英语小故事：征婚启事
Things were really getting worse after the war. Life became so difficult that a lot of people lived in want(在贫困中).
A newspaper had published an advertisement for a man in want of tires: "Owner of a truck would like to correspond with a widow who owns two tires. Object: matrimony(结婚). Send picture of tires."
战后情况真是越来越糟了。生活变得非常艰难，缺少东西的人很多。
有一家报纸曾给一个需要轮胎的人登过一个这样的广告：“一部货车的车主愿意和一位备有两个轮胎的寡妇通信。目的：成婚。 要把轮胎的照片寄过来。”
幽默风趣英语小故事：一个遭遇海难的水手
A sailor was the only survivor of the shipwreck.
He had to stay on a desert island for three years.
One day he was very pleased to find a ship anchored in the day. When a small boat cameashore, an officer handed him a bunch of newspaper and said, "The captain suggests you read what's going on the world, and then tell us if you want to be rescued."
一个水手是船只失事后唯一的幸存者。
他不得不在一个荒岛上待了三年。
伪文艺的姑娘
英语幽默故事三则
下面是网我为大家带来的英语幽默故事三则，希望大家能够能在快乐中学习，在学习中快乐~
1.Bragging 吹牛
Three famous surgeons were bragging about their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off，“said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist."
三名著名的外科医生在吹嘘着各自的高超医术。其中一个说:“有个人切断了一只手，他来找我治疗，如今，他已成为音乐会的小提琴手。”
That's nothing." said another.“A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched them back on，and today that man is a marathon runner."
“那有什么，”另一个不服，“有个家伙的`两条腿全断了，我给他接上了。现在这家伙是马拉松运动员。”
"I can top both of you，"said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. ,There was nothing left but a horse's posterior---and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in the United States Senate. "
“你们俩都比不上我。”第三个人说，“有一天，我被叫到一起事故的现场。当时那儿什么都没留下，只有一个马屁股和一副眼镜。现在那个人就坐在美国参议院中。”
2.Wrongly dressed 穿错了
I wanted to look especially nice when I valked my son to his first day of kindergarten，so I took the liberty of borrowing an outfit from my younger，more fashionable sister，who was staying with us at the time. We had agreed not to borrow from one another without asking，but she was asleep，so I slipped some shorts and a shirt out of her drawer silently，planning to put them back before she woke up.
在陪儿子上幼儿园的第一天，我想打扮一下自己。我打算从妹妹那儿借身外衣，她年径而且时髦。妹妹和我们住在一起。我们有约在先，不经过对方的同意不能拿别人的东西。但那时她仍在睡觉。于是，我从她的衣拒里轻径拿走几条短裤和一件村衣，本想趁她没醒来时再放回去。
To my surprise .she was awake when I got back, but she didn't mention the clothes. We chatted about Jason's introduction to kindergarten. Finally，she smiled and asked coolly，"And how did Jason's teacher like my pajamas?"
让我吃惊的是，当我送儿子去幼儿园回来后，妹妹已经醒了。但她没说衣服的事儿。我们聊了聊儿子吉森在幼儿园做自我介绍的情况。最后，妹妹笑着并不动声色地问:“吉森的老师觉得我的睡衣怎徉?”
3.Dating for mother 为母亲约会
When the young waitress in the cafe in my building started waving hello every day，I was flattered. She was at least 15 years younger than I.
在我工作的大楼里有间咖啡馆，那儿的女招待每天见到我都向我打招呼。我因此受宠若惊。要知道她至少要比我小15岁。
One day she waved and beckoned to me. When I strolled over，she asked，"Are you single?"
有一天，她见到我后，朝我招手示意让我过去。于是，我便走了过去。她问我，“你现在是单身吗?”
Why，yes,"I replied，smiling at her broadly.
“对，是单身。”我满脸堆笑地说。
" So is my mom，”she said.”Would you like to meet her?"
“我母亲也是，”她说:“你愿意不愿意见见她。”
