艾米莉郡主
Peter dozed off while his teacher was talking. 老师正在讲课，彼得打起瞌睡来了。 Teacher: Peter！Tell us, what's the biggest in the world? 老师：彼得！你说说，世界上什么最大？ Peter: Well, well....eyelids.... 彼得: 嗯……嗯……眼皮…… Teacher: What？Eyelids？ 老师：什么？眼皮？ Peter: Yes, sir. Because as soon as I shut my eyes, the eyelids cover everything of the world. 彼得：是的，老师。因为我眼睛一闭，眼皮就把世界上所有的东西都遮住了。 。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。很简单
MOMO丫丫
下面是我整理的2人幽默英语对话，希望对大家有帮助。
2人幽默英语对话1：
男: This seat empty?(这个座位是空的吧?)
女：Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.(是的，如果你坐下，我的座位就是空的。)【我立马走人】
男：Haven''t I seen you some place before?(我好像以前在什么地方见过你?)
女：Yes. That''s why I don''t go there anymore.(是的。这就是为什么我不再去那个地方的原因。)【我不想和你有任何交集】
男：Will you go out with me this Saturday?(这个星期六你想跟我出去吗?)
女：Sorry. I''m having a headache this weekend.(抱歉。这个周末我头疼)【^_^头疼也是可以预约的】
男：Can I have your name?(我能知道你的名字吗?)
女：Why? Don''t you already have one? (为什么?你不是已经有一个了吗?)
男：I''m a photographer. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是摄影师。我一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。)
女：I''m a plastic surgeon. I''ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是整形外科医生。我也一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸。)【长的真丑】
男：I think I could make you very happy.(我想我能让你非常快乐。)
女：Why? Are you leaving?(是吗?你是说你要离开?)【你能离开就是对我的仁慈】
2人幽默英语对话2：
男:Hello, I’m Ben. May I ask you some questions?
女:Sure.
男:What is your father’s name?
女:Happy!
男:Then, What is your mother’s name?
女:Smile!
男:Are you joking?
女:No! That’s my sister! I am Kidding. By the way, are you a census staff?
男:Of course not.
女:Go ahead.
男:OK. Your name is Kidding. Kidding, I'm going to start a
band. Will you join us?
女:Sure, Ben. I'd love to be in a band
男:OK, good. Which instrument do you play? I heard that you can play piano very well.
女:Piano? I don't play an instrument actually.
男:What are you good at?
女:I sing. I like music with great lyrics.
男: So do I. Who else do you think can join us?
女:Well, Dave is supposed to be a good one.
男:Really? What does he like?
女:He prefers quiet music.
男:Good. How about Harry? He plays the guitar, doesn’t he?
女:Yes, but Harry loves loud music such as disco .
男:That's OK. I often go to disco with my friends.
女:You mean we can play both loud music and quiet music?
男:Why not?
女:What kind of music style do you prefer, Ben?
男:Oh, I like music that I can dance to.
But we have one problem with our band
女:what is it?
男:I'm not a musician and I can't sing.
女:Are you joking?
男:No, that’s your sister’s name. Just now I was kidding.
女:Well, that makes sense?!
2人幽默英语对话3：
前台小姐：“you have what thing?”
你有什么事
老外：“can you speak english?” 你能说英语吗
前台小姐：“if i not speak english, i am speaking what?”如果我没在说英语，那我在说什么?
老外：“can anybody else speak english? ”有没有其他人会说
前台小姐：“you yourself look. all people are playing,no people have time, you can wait, you wait, you not wait, you go.”你自己看看，所有的人都在玩，没有人有时间，你可以等，你等，你不等，随你。
老外：“good heavens. anybody here can speak english?”上帝，这有人会说英语吗
前台小姐：“ shout what shout, quiet a little, you on earth have what thing.”叫什么叫，安静一点，你在这里有什么事
老外：“i want to speak to your head.”我想要跟你的上司讲。
前台小姐：“head not zai.you tomorrow come.”头不在，你明天来。
Joanrry琼
I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles. "When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."
