耀眼的小日
英语小笑话带翻译短
英语小笑话带翻译短一：
Do You Know My Work?One night a hotel caught fire， and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes. Two men stood outside and looked at the fire. “Before I came out，” said one，“I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire， the fire burns it. So I took all the bills that I could find.No one will be poorer because I took them.” “You don't know my work，” said the other. “What is your work?” “I'm a policeman. “Oh!” cried the first man. He thought quickly and said，“And do you know my work?”“No，”said the policeman. “I'm a writer. I'm always telling stories about things that never happened.”
你知道我是干什么的吗? 一天晚上，一家旅馆失火，住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡 衣就跑了出来。 两个人站在外面，看着大火。 “在我出来之前，”其中一个说：“我跑进一些房间，找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里，火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。” “你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个说。 “你是干什么的?” “我是警察。” “噢!”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动，说：“那你知道我是干什么的?”“不知道。”警察说。 “我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的.故事。”
英语小笑话带翻译短二：
Wife talking to her husband，who reads newspaper all day: I wish I were a newspaper so I'll be in your hands all day.
Husband: I wish that too, so I could change you daily
妻子和丈夫谈话，他一天到晚总是看报纸，妻子抱怨说：我要是报纸就好了，那样我就可以天天在你手里了。
丈夫说我也希望那样，那样我就可以每天换一个了。
NOTE
I wish I were ....是虚拟语气的说法，表示希望发生但不会发生的。
英语小笑话带翻译短三：
The Crowded Store
It was the day of the big sale. Rumors of the sale (and some advertising in the local paper) were the main reason for the long line that formed by 8:30, the store's opening time, in front of the store.
A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back, amid loud and colorful curse. On the man's second attempt, he was punched square in the jaw, and knocked around a bit, and then thrown at the end of the line again.
As he got up, he said to the person at the end of the line,” That does it! If they hit me one more time, I won't open the store!"
一天，一个商店降价大甩卖。人们在开店之前就排在了商店门前，排成了很长的一队。一个身材矮小的人推挤着想到队伍的前面，但被推了回来，而且被咒骂着插队。那个人又一次努力往前挤， 但是又被挤到了最后面，而且下巴被重重的碰了几下，他对最后一个人说：“如果他们再次这样对我，我就不去开商店门了!!!”
小树小树小树
笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。我精心收集了最简短的英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!
嫩的稀奇!
Like most colleges，the food at St. Mary's College of Maryland scores low marks for both quality and variety.One exception is our annual steak-and-shrimp
night;but even this cari t escape the critics.
像很多大学一样，玛丽兰的圣·玛丽学院的伙食无论从花样上，还是从质量上评分都作低。咋一的例外是我们每年的牛排大虾之夜。但，即使是这天的食品，也很难逃脱评论
家的评论。我听到一个学生说:“这块牛排应烧得再嫩一点儿。”
"This steak could be a little more rare ," I overheard a fellow student say.
她的同伴说:“小声点儿，一年一次就够稀奇的了。(注:英语中，嫩和稀奇都是rare。)
"Pipe down,"whispered her companion. "Once a year is rare enough !”
经验
The manager of a fast-food franchise was approached by a teenager looking for a job. "Have you had any experience with fast food?"the manager asked.
一位少年来封一家快餐馆找工作，经理问他:“你有在快餐店工作的经脸吗7"
The young man paused for a moment.“Well，“he replied，”I've eaten a lot of it.”
年轻人想了想说:“这么说吧，我吃过很多次快餐。”
买书，但不用!
" This is the book recommended this quarter,”announced my political science professor on the first day of class. "However，we won't use it much, because my primary purpose is to teach you to think.”
“这段时间，我推荐你们用这本书。”政治经济学教授在我们的第一堂课上说。“可是，我们这本书用得不多。因为，我的主要目的是想教你们怎样思维。”
Angered that my hard-earned money had been wasted,I raised my hand，”You mean I just spent$22. 50 on a book I won't need?"
听到这儿我感到很气愤。难道我辛苦挣来的钱就这么浪费掉了吗?于是，我举手问:“您是说，我刚花了22. 5美元买了本我们不用的书?”
" Good，"replied the professor with a smile."Your re starting to think already."
“很好!"教授笑着说:“你已经开始思考了。”
