树果衣嘎凌
“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松，在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面我为大家带来幽默风趣英语小故事三则，欢迎大家阅读!
幽默风趣英语小故事：恭喜
"I'd like you to come right over," a man phoned an undertaker(承办人), " and supervise the burial of my poor, departed wife."
"Your wife!" gasped the undertaker, "Didn't I bury her two years ago?"
"You don't understand," said the man, "You see I married again."
"Oh," said the undertaker, "Congratulations!"
一位男子给殡仪馆老板打电话：“我希望你能来我这里主持我可怜的妻子的葬礼。”
老板吃力地说：“你的妻子!我在两年前没有埋葬她吗?”
男子说：“你不知道，我又结婚了”
“噢”， 老板说，“恭喜恭喜!”
幽默风趣英语小故事：征婚启事
Things were really getting worse after the war. Life became so difficult that a lot of people lived in want(在贫困中).
A newspaper had published an advertisement for a man in want of tires: "Owner of a truck would like to correspond with a widow who owns two tires. Object: matrimony(结婚). Send picture of tires."
战后情况真是越来越糟了。生活变得非常艰难，缺少东西的人很多。
有一家报纸曾给一个需要轮胎的人登过一个这样的广告：“一部货车的车主愿意和一位备有两个轮胎的寡妇通信。目的：成婚。 要把轮胎的照片寄过来。”
幽默风趣英语小故事：一个遭遇海难的水手
A sailor was the only survivor of the shipwreck.
He had to stay on a desert island for three years.
One day he was very pleased to find a ship anchored in the day. When a small boat cameashore, an officer handed him a bunch of newspaper and said, "The captain suggests you read what's going on the world, and then tell us if you want to be rescued."
一个水手是船只失事后唯一的幸存者。
他不得不在一个荒岛上待了三年。
情感白羊座
英语作为一门语言和思维统一的学科,其内在本质是语言与思维的辨证统一。英语故事教学不仅能有效地学习英语知识,亦能有效地培养学生的思维能力。我整理了有关3分钟幽默英语小故事，欢迎阅读!
狗也知道这个谚语吗
The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.
一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。
"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"
“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：‘吠狗不咬人。”
"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"
“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗?”
智慧乐观的父亲
I had iust learned to drive and, like most teen-agers，begged at every opportunity to take over the wheel. During a family vacation my father finally allowed me drive on a long，straight stretch on highway.I was in my glory until there was a sudden turn in the road.Caught unaware, I swung too wide and ran into a service station's advertising sign. I stopped the cat and waited for a lecture.
像大多数的青少年一样，我刚学会开车时，总想利用一切开车的机会。有一次家庭外出度假时，我经过请求，爸爸终于允许我在笔直的高速公路止驾驶。我感到十分荣幸，直到开到了一个急转弯，由于转盘转动得太大，车直奔着加油站的广告牌冲去。我停下了车，等着挨训。
My father，always considerate of his children's feelings，turned back to the rest of family and said. "As long as we're here,does anyone need to use the rest room?"
我的父亲总是考虑到孩子的情绪，转过身对家里的其他人说:“既然我们已经把车开到了这儿，有人想上厕所吗?”
"You can't imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife," the man complained to his friend.“
你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，
"She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong.“
她问我一个问题，然后自己回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。”
坚强一点Aaron
龟兔赛跑：
It is the day of a big race.All the animals in the forestare watching the race,look at the two runners,Mr rabbit and Mr Turtle.Mr Rabbit says,"In the forest,no one is faster than me."
When the race begins,Mr Rabbit runs faster.In a minute Mr Rabbit can't see Mr Turtle,so he stops and have a rest.Mr Turtle runs slowly,But he doesn't stop.When Mr rabbit is sleeping,Mr Turtle runs by.
When Mr Rabbit wakes up,Mr Turtle is touching the finishing line.Mr Rabbit loses the race,and Mr Turtlewins the race.
今天是盛大的比赛日，小动物们都聚集在森林观看比赛，接下来要上场的是兔子和乌龟，兔子口出狂言声称林里没人比他跑得快。
比赛开始了，兔子跑得非常快，很快就把乌龟甩在身后了，过了一会儿，兔子看不见乌龟了，就停下来睡了一觉。乌龟跑的非常慢，但他一刻也不停。当乌龟爬过兔子身边时，他还在睡觉呢！
兔子醒来的时候，乌龟已经抵达终点了，兔子输掉了比赛，乌龟赢得了冠军！
出自 公众号：英语故事课堂 来源
蜡笔1982
Five Months Older
The Second World War had begun, and John wanted to join the army, but he was only 16 years old, and boys were allowed to join only if they were over 18. So when the army doctor examined him, he said that he was 18.
But John‘s brother had joined the army a few days before, and the same doctor had examined him too. This doctor remembered the older boy‘s family name, so when he saw John‘s papers, he was surprised.
"How old are you?" he said.
"Eighteen, sir," said John.
"But your brother was eighteen, too," said the doctor. "Are you twins?"
"Oh, no, sir," said John, and his face went red. "My brother is five months older than I am."
大五个月
第二次世界大战开始了，约翰想参军，可他只有十六岁，当时规定男孩到十八岁才能入伍。所以军医给他进行体检时，他说他已经十八岁了。
可约翰的哥哥刚入伍没几天，而且也是这个军医给他做的检查。这位医生还记得他哥哥的姓。所以当他看到约翰的表格时，感到非常惊奇。
“你多大了?”军医问。
“十八，长官。”约翰说。
“可你的哥哥也是十八岁，你们是双胞胎吗?”
约翰脸红了，说：“哦，不是，长官，我哥哥比我大五个月。”
优质英语培训问答知识库
