kami麻麻
A Sikh, an Italian & a Frenchman were drinking in a pub when the subject of WOMAN came up in their conversation. The Italian said, in Italy we treat the woman like a guitar. We press the top & tickle the bottom. The Frenchman said, in France, we treat the woman like cognac. We smell first & then lick slowly. What about the woman in your country, Mr Singh? The Italian asked. In our country, we treat the woman like a record. First we play the front &/when we finish, we flip it over & pl 笑话2.About Drivers What's the first thing that come to your mind when you see a Chinese man driving a BMW 3 series? * A pimp What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you see a Malay man driving a BMW 3 series? * Ahmad What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you see an Indian man driving a BMW 3 series? * A car jockey What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you see a Bhai driving a BMW 3 series? * A car repossesor. 笑话3.Bill Gates Bill Gates dies in a car accident. He finds himself in purgatory, being sized up by God "Well, Bill, I'm really confused on this call; I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in America, yet you also created that ghastly Windows '95. I'm going to do something I've never done before; in your case, I'm going to let you decide where you want to go." Bill replied, " Well, what's the difference between the two?" God said, "I'm willing to let you visit both places briefly, if it will help your decision." "Fine, but where should I go first?" "I'll leave that up to you." "Okay then," said Bill, "Let's try Hell first." So Bill went to Hell. It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters and lots of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining, the temperature perfect. He was very pleased. "This is great!" he told God. "If this is hell, I REALLY want to see heaven!" "Fine," said God, and off they went. Heaven was a place high in the clouds, with angels drifting about, playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute, and rendered his decision. "Hmmmm. I think I'd prefer Hell," he told God. "Fine," retorted God, "as you desire." So Bill Gates went to Hell. Two weeks later, God decided to check on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When he got there, he found Bill, shackled to a wall, screaming amongst hot flames in dark caves, being burned and tortured by demons. "How's everything going?" he asked Bill. Bill responded, with his voice filled with anguish and disappointment, "this is awful! This is nothing like the Hell I visited two weeks ago! I can't believe this is happening! What happened to that other place, with the beaches, the beautiful women playing in the water????! "That was the SCREENSAVER," replied God. 真抱歉,我已经尽力了.这些只好你自己删节了,的确有些词初一应该没学.真不好意思啊.
雯雯闯天涯
呵呵！英文我可差劲了，所以还是不说的好！中文的还可以给你讲一个：某君到一饭店吃饭，随便点了一碗牛肉面，但是面上桌后，看到面里根本就没有一丁点牛肉，所以找老板麻烦：“老板，我点的牛肉面，为何面里一点牛肉都没有”？老板答：“不要为菜名所误导，牛肉面没里没牛肉很正常嘛！要是按你的意思说牛肉面里必须要有牛肉的话，那要是你点一道虎皮青椒的话，我不是还要给你盖张虎皮？要是你点一道夫妻肺片的话，我不是还要给你杀两个人？要是你娃点一道老婆饼的话，难不成还要给你搭个老婆？”
吃吃喝喝小蚊子
VegetarianismA man was talking to his friends about why he was a vegetarian. "I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals," he said, "I'm a vegetarian 'cause I HATE plants!" 素食主义者一个人和他的朋友聊为什么他会是个素食主义者。他朋友说“我不是素食主义者是因为我热爱动物”他说：我是素食主义者因为我恨蔬菜（笑点：他朋友爱动物所以吃动物，他只吃蔬菜是因为他恨蔬菜所以要吃掉）汉语和括号里面的是我自己解释的，笑话还是原汁原味的好，解释了就不好笑了，^_^第二个Yum YumQ:How do you make a Swiss roll? A:you push them down the Alps. 问 你怎么做(内卷果酱或者奶油)的蛋糕？答：你把他们从阿而卑斯山上推下去。笑点是 Swiss roll是一种蛋糕的名字，回答的人是一个词一个词理解的。汗死哈哈第三个Balance dietQ:What is a balance diet? A:The same amont of cokies in each hand! 问 什么是平衡饮食？答 就是用两个手吃同样数量的饼干。
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