小小小黄鱼
英语 故事 会出现学生认识或是不认识的单词,而这个单词的重复不断出现,会加深同学们对单词的记忆。这种记忆不是死记硬背,而是在潜移默化中,让学生记住。这次我给大家整理了英语幽默小故事,供大家阅读参考。
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英语幽默小故事1
Don't Pick Up the Money on the Ground
An economist professor and a student are walking down the street when they see a $20 bill lying on the sidewalk in front of them. The student goes to pick up the money but his professor stops him and tells him not to bother.
Why not?
If it were a real twenty-dollar bill, someone would have picked it up already.
Everything that can be invented has been invented.
别捡地上的钱
一位经济学教授和一名学生正在大街上行走,这时他们看到前面的人行道上躺着一张20美元面值的钞票。学生走过去准备捡,教授制止了他,告诉他别自寻烦恼。
“为什么不捡?”
“假如那是一张真20美元钞票的话,早就有人捡走了。”
“该发明的都已经被发明出来了。”
英语幽默小故事2
The Less You Know, the More Money You Make
Theorem: Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives.
Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true:
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows, Power=Work/Time. Since Knowledge=Power, and Time=Money, we have
Knowledge=Work/Money. Solving for Money, we get: Money=Work/Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity regardless of the Work done.
Conclusion: The less you know, the more money you make.
知识越少挣钱越多
定理:工程师和科学家永远应当比经济专家挣钱少。
下面是对该定理的一个严格的数学证明:
假设一:知识就是力量(Power)。
假设二:时间就是金钱。
每个工程师都知道:功率(Power)= 。既然知识=力量,时间=金钱,我们有:知识= 。求解金钱表达式,我们得到:金钱= 。
因此,当知识趋于零时,无论你做了多少功,金钱趋于无穷大。
结论:知识越少,你挣得的金钱就越多。
英语幽默小故事3
They Should Be Playing at Night
A therapist, a priest and an economist go golfing. The group ahead of them is extremely slow, leading to some frustration among the three. Their complaints are overheard, and a man from the group ahead walks over to them. He introduces himself as an aide because the group of golfers he is with is blind! The aide thanks the three in appreciation for their patience for the blind golfers. The priest goes, "Oh no, all my life I've preached for all to be better to my fellow man and here I am complaining about the blind!" The therapist says, "I've been trained my whole life to help others and here I am complaining about the blind, shame on me!" The economist says, "Oh no! They should be playing at night."
他们本该在晚上打球
神父、心理学家和经济学家三人结伴打高尔夫。前面的一组打球进度极其缓慢,这让三人大为恼火。他们开始抱怨,前面那组中的一人听到抱怨声后朝他们走了过来。他 自我介绍 说是前面那组球手们的助手,因为那组球手都是盲人。助手感谢他们三位耐心等待。神父听后忙说:“哦,不会吧?我一辈子都在祈祷同胞们过上更美好的生活,而我却在这里抱怨这些盲人!”心理学家也赶紧说:“我一生的信条是帮助别人,可是我却在这里抱怨这些盲人,我真惭愧!”这时只听经济学家说:“哦,别这样!他们本该在晚上打球的。”
英语幽默小故事4
A fellow pilot flying over the Midwest heard an air-traffic controller trying to contact an airliner for normal frequency change.“Flight 354,“said the controller,"contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.“The request was repeated several times with no reply from the pilot.Finally,in exasperation the controller raised his voice."Flight 354,Simon says contact Kansas City Center on frequency 135.5.”The call was acknowledged with an emharrassed reply and prompt compliance.
一名飞行员在中西部上空听到地面指挥塔的指挥员在呼叫一民航调整其正常接收频率。"354航班,”指挥塔在呼叫,“请与堪萨斯市中心135.5频率联系。”这一指令重复了几次之后,竟没得到任何回音。最后,指挥塔的指挥员显然是被激怒了,他大声地锐:"354航班,西蒙说速与135. 5预率联系。”这一声显然奏效,只听对方慌忙地做了回答并迅速服从了指挥。”
英语幽默小故事5
Even My Driver Can Answer that Question
A famous game theorist, having won the Clark prize, was set to give a series of lectures at prestigious universities throughout the northeast. For the task, he hired a car and driver to take him from place to place . With nothing else to do, the driver would sit in on the highly technical lectures. After several lectures, the driver commented to the economist, "You know, I've heard your lecture so much that I think I could deliver it myself." The economist found this idea intriguing and decided to switch places with him at his next lecture.
The driver gave the talk flawlessly. However, after the lecture, some one in the audience asked him a rather technical question that the driver had no idea how to even begin to answer. The driver considered it for a moment, and then replied, "That question is so easy, even my driver can answer it."
甚至我的司机都能回答那个问题
一位著名的博弈论专家一获得克拉克奖便开始在东北部各个知名大学展开一系列讲座。为了完成这项任务,他租了一辆车并雇了一名司机载着他到处赶场。没有别的事可做的司机就坐在课堂里听专家那科技含量颇高的讲座。几场讲座下来,司机对这位经济学家说:“我听了这么多次你的讲座,我觉得我自己也能讲了。”经济学家觉得这个想法很有趣,于是决定下次作讲座时他们两个互换位置。
司机完美无瑕地完成了演讲。可是当讲座结束后,听众中有人问了他一个技术含量相当高的问题,他不知如何开口回答。司机沉思了一会,回答道:“这个问题太简单了,连我的司机都能回答。”
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叶伟2050
Cinderella is a beautiful girl. She has two ugly stepsisters. They are not kind to Cinderella. Cinderella does all of the work. She must cook, clean and do everything. 灰姑娘是个美丽的女孩。她有两个继母生的丑姊姊。这两个姊姊对灰姑娘很不好。所有的事都得要灰姑娘做。她必须煮饭、洗衣,什么事她都要做。One day, a letter comes to the house. It is a letter from the prince. He will have a big party. He would like the three girls to come. The prince wants to find a wife. 有一天,家里收到一封信。信是王子寄的。他要举行盛大的宴会。他希望三个女孩子能一起来。王子要挑选王妃Cinderella can't go to the party because she doesn't have beautiful clothes. Her stepsisters have beautiful clothes. They look very happy. Cinderella is very sad. 灰姑娘不能参加宴会,因为她没有漂亮的衣服。她两个姊姊却有漂亮衣服。她们的表情好愉快。灰姑娘伤心透了。Cinderella's stepsisters leave the house. They are going to the prince's party.Cinderella cries. She also wants to go to the party. Suddenly, a woman shows up. She is a kind fairy. 灰姑娘的两个姊姊出门了。她们要参加王子的宴会。灰姑娘哭了。她也想去赴宴。突然间,有一位女士出现了。她是个好心的仙女。 "Don't worry," says the fairy. "You can go to the prince's party." "I can't go," cries Cinderella. "I don't have a nice dress." “别担心,”仙女说。”你可以参加王子的宴会。”“我去不了,”灰姑娘哭道。”我没有象样的衣服。”"It will be all right," says the fairy. "Go get a pumpkin, six mice and a rat." Cinderella quickly finds them. "What will you do?" Cinderella asks. The fairy waves her wand over the pumpkin. “没关系,”仙女说。”替我找一个南瓜,六只家鼠及一只田鼠来。”灰姑娘很快就找到这些东西。”您要怎么做?”灰姑娘问道。仙女把魔棒在南瓜上面挥了一下。The pumpkin is now a beautiful silver coach. The fairy waves her wand over the six mice. She changes them into six strong men. The six men will walk with the coach. Then the fairy changes the rat into a man. He is the driver of the coach. 南瓜现在变成了华丽的银马车。仙女把魔棒在六只老鼠上面挥了一挥。她把他们变成六名壮汉。这六名壮汉会跟着马车一块走。接着,仙女再把田鼠变成一名男子,他成了马车夫。The coach is beautiful, but Cinderella still looks sad. "I still can't go to the party. My dress is too ugly," she says. "Don't worry," says the fairy. She waves her wand and makes Cinderella's dress beautiful. 马车很华丽,可是灰姑娘仍然一副悲伤的模样。”我还是去不了宴会。我的衣服很丑,”她说。”别担心,”仙女说道。她挥了挥魔棒,便把灰姑娘的衣服变得很漂亮了。 Now Cinderella has a nice dress. It is gold and very pretty. Her shoes are made of glass. Cinderella is so beautiful. She can go to the party. 现在灰姑娘有了象样的衣服,是黄金做的,很漂亮。她的鞋是玻璃做的。灰姑娘模样真美,可以赴宴去了。 "You must leave the party before twelve o'clock," says the fairy. "At 12:00 the magic will end." "I will be back before twelve o'clock," says Cinderella. She gets into the coach to go to the party. “你必须在十二点以前离开宴会,”仙女说。”十二点时,法力就会消失。” “我会在十二点以前赶回来,”灰姑娘说。她上了马车赴宴去了。 The prince's palace is full of people. They are all happy to be at the big party. All the girls want to marry the prince. Then Cinderella walks into the palace. "Who is she?" everyone asks. "She's so beautiful," they say. 王子的宫殿挤满了人。他们各个都很高兴参加这个盛大的宴会。所有的女孩子都想嫁给王子。这时灰姑娘走入皇宫。”她是谁呀?”每个人都问道。”她好美,”他们都说。 The prince sees Cinderella. He asks her to dance with him. All night long they dance and talk. The prince and Cinderella fall in love. At twelve o'clock, Cinderella runs out of the palace. 王子看到了灰姑娘。他邀请她与他共舞。他们整晚都在跳舞聊天。王子与灰姑娘坠入情网了。十二点时,灰姑娘跑出了宫殿。 Cinderella runs and loses one of her glass shoes. She must get home before twelve. She is late. She runs into the house. Now, she is wearing her old dress again. 灰姑娘跑呀跑的,掉了一只玻璃鞋。她必须在十二点前赶回家。她迟到了。她跑进家门。现在,她身上穿的又是原来的那一件旧衣服。 The prince finds Cinderella's shoe. "I know this shoe. It belongs to that beautiful girl. I'll find her," he says. The next morning, he goes from house to house to find her. He goes to Cinderella's house. The two ugly stepsisters try on the shoe, but their feet are too big. 王子发现了灰姑娘的那只鞋。”我记得这只鞋,它是那位漂亮姑娘的。我要找到她,”他说。第二天早上,他便挨家挨户去找她。他来到灰姑娘的家。两个丑姊姊试穿这只鞋,不过她们的脚太大了。 "Can I try it on?" asks Cinderella. "Yes," the prince says, so Cinderella tries the shoe on. It fits her foot. "I have found my princess," the prince says. Soon Cinderella and the prince get married. They live happily ever after. “我可以试穿吗?”灰姑娘问道。”可以,”王子说,于是灰姑娘就试穿那只鞋。鞋很合脚。”我已经找到我的妃子了,”王子说。灰姑娘和王子很快结了婚。他们从此过着幸福的生活。
半夜磨牙
多阅读一些英语童话小 故事 ,会提高孩子的 英语阅读 能力而且对口语和词汇量的增加也有所帮助。下面就是我整理的经典英语小故事十篇,希望大家喜欢。
经典英语小故事(一):
A mouse once took a bite out of a bull's tail as he lay dozing。 The bull jumped up in a rage and, with his head low to the ground, chased the mouse right across the yard。 The mouse was too quick for him, however, and slipped easily into a hole in the wall。
The bull charged the wall furiously again and again, but although he bruised his head and chipped his horns, the mouse stayed safely inside his hole。 After a time the bull gave up and sank down to rest again。
As soon as the bull was asleep, the little mouse crept to the mouth of the hole, pattered across the yard, bit the bull again -- this time on the nose -- and rushed back to safety。 As the bull roared helplessly the mouse squeaked:
"It's not always the big people who e off best。 Sometimes the small ones win, you know。"
老鼠和公牛
有一次,公牛躺着打盹,一只老鼠咬了他的尾巴。公牛怒气冲冲地跳起来,低着头追老鼠,一向追过院子。然而,老鼠跑得比他快多了,从容地钻到墙洞里去了。
公牛一次又一次地猛撞墙壁,尽管头撞肿了,角撞裂了,老鼠却安然待在洞里。过了一会儿,公牛不撞了,倒下歇着。
公牛刚睡着,小老鼠就爬到洞口,嗒嗒地跑过院子,又咬了公牛一口??这回咬了鼻子??又跑回安全的地方去。当公牛毫无办法地吼叫时,老鼠吱吱叫道:
"大人物并不总占上风。有时小人物也会取胜。"
经典英语小故事(二):
On a vacation trip, Duke Huan of the state of Qi came to the ruin of the capital of Guo Shi , which perished long ago。
Seeing the desolate and bleak prospects of broken tiles, collapsed walls, and clusters of weeds, he could not help asking the local people about the reason of the ruin of Guo Shi。
They replied,"Guo Shi was fond of doing good deeds, and averse to evildoing, which led to the perdition。"
When the Duke could not understand the answer, people explained ," Though he liked doing good, he had never been able to do so; though he hated evildoing, never could he help not participating。 That caused the ruin of his capital。"
郭氏之墟
齐桓公出游途中,来到已经灭亡许久的郭氏都城的废墟。
看到瓦砾残垣、杂草丛生的萧条景象,忍不住问当地百姓郭氏灭亡的原因。
百姓们回答说:"郭氏由于喜爱善行善事。厌恶邪恶丑行而导致灭亡。"
齐桓公不能理解这种回答,百姓们便解释说:"郭氏虽然喜爱善行善事,但从来都不能做到;尽管厌恶邪恶丑行,却总是忍不住参与其中。这就是他的都城变成废墟的原因。"
经典英语小故事(三):
Making His Mark
A man from the state of Chu was taking a boat across a river when he dropped his sword into the water carelessly。 Immediately he made a mark on the side of the boat where the sword dropped, hoping to find it later。 When the boat stopped moving, he went into the water to search for his sword at the place where he had marked the boat。 As we know, the boat had moved but the sword had not。 Isn't this a very foolish way to look for a sword?
刻舟求剑
楚国有个人坐船渡江时,他不细心把自我的一把宝剑掉落江中。他立刻掏出一把小刀,在宝剑落水的船舷上刻上一个记号。船靠岸后,那楚人立即从船上刻记号的地方跳下水去捞取掉落的宝剑。他怎样找得到宝剑呢?船继续行驶,而宝剑却不会再移动。像他这样去找剑,真是太愚蠢可笑了。
经典英语小故事(四):
The miser and his gold Once upon a time there was a miser。 He hid his gold under a tree。 Every week he used to dig it up。
One night a robber stole all the gold。 When the miser came again, he found nothing but an empty hole。
He was surprised, and then burst into tears。All the neighbors gathered around him。
He told them how he used to e and visit his gold。
"Did you ever take any of it out?" asked one of them。 "No," he said, "I only came to look at it。" "Then e again and look at the hole," said the neighbor, "it will be the same as looking at the gold。"
守财奴
从前,有个守财奴将他的金块埋到一棵树下,每周他都去把他挖出来看看。
一天晚上,一个小偷挖走了所有的金块。 守财奴再来查看时,发现除了一个空洞什么都没有了。
守财奴便捶胸痛哭。哭声引来了邻居
他告诉他们那里原先有他的金块。
问明了原因后,一个邻居问:“你使用过这些金块吗?” “没用过,” 他说,“我只是时常来看看。”“那么,以后再来看这个洞,”邻居说,“就像以前有金块时一样。”
经典英语小故事(五):
The City Mouse and the Country Mouse
Once there were two mice。 They were friends。 One mouse lived in the country; the other mouse lived in the city。 After many years the Country mouse saw the City mouse; he said, "Do e and see me at my house in the country。" So the City mouse went。 The City mouse said, "This food is not good, and your house is not good。 Why do you live in a hole in the field? You should e and live in the city。 You would live in a nice house made of stone。 You would have nice food to eat。 You must e and see me at my house in the city。"
The Country mouse went to the house of the City mouse。 It was a very good house。 Nice food was set ready for them to eat。 But just as they began to eat they heard a great noise。 The City mouse cried, " Run! Run! The cat is ing!" They ran away quickly and hid。
After some time they came out。 When they came out, the Country mouse said, "I do not like living in the city。 I like living in my hole in the field。 For it is nicer to be poor and happy, than to be rich and afraid。"
城里老鼠和乡下老鼠
从前,有两只老鼠,它们是好朋友。一只老鼠居住在乡村,另一只住在城里。很多年以后,乡下老鼠碰到城里老鼠,它说:“你必须要来我乡下的家看看。”于是,城里老鼠就去了。乡下老鼠领着它到了一块田地上它自我的家里。它把所有最精美食物都找出来给城里老鼠。城里老鼠说:“这东西不好吃,你的家也不好,你为什么住在田野的地洞里呢?你应当搬到城里去住,你能住上用石头造的漂亮房子,还会吃上美味佳肴,你应当到我城里的家看看。”
乡下老鼠就到城里老鼠的家去。房子十分漂亮,好吃的东西也为他们摆好了。可是正当他们要开始吃的时候,听见很大的一阵响声,城里的老鼠叫喊起来:“快跑!快跑!猫来了!”他们飞快地跑开躲藏起来。
过了一会儿,他们出来了。当他们出来时,乡下老鼠说:“我不喜欢住在城里,我喜欢住在田野我的洞里。因为这样虽然贫穷可是欢乐自在,比起虽然富有却要过着提心吊胆的生活来说,要好些。
经典英语小故事(六):
A Man and a Satyr having struck up an acquaintance, sat down together to eat。 The day being wintry and cold, the Man put his fingers to his mouse and blew opon them。 "What's that for, my friend?" asked the Satyr。 " My hands are so cold," said the Man, "I do it to warm them。" In a little while some hot food was placed before them, and the Man, raising the dish to his mouse, again blew opon it。 "And what's the meaning of that, now?" said the Satyr。 "Oh," replied the Man, "my porridge is so hot, I do it to cool it。" "Nay, then," said the Satyr, "from this moment I renounce your friendship, for I will have nothing to do with one who blows hot and cold with the same mouse。"
一个人与赛特偶然相识,坐在一齐吃东西。正值冬季,天气很冷,那人把手放在嘴边哈气。赛特问道“我的朋友,那是干吗?”这人说“我的手太冷了,这是为了取暖”。过了一会儿,热腾腾的食物端上来了,那人把碟子举到嘴边又吹了起来,赛特问“这又是干吗?”,那人说“哦,我的粥太烫了,我把他吹凉些”。赛特说“从此刻起,我要与你绝交,因为我不想和一个反复无常的人做朋友”。
经典英语小故事(七):
Drop at the fox in the well with the 公 goat
An only the fox take a wrong stepped the well, in spite of how he struggle can not still climb up, and have to be foolish there。The 公 goat feels
Thirsty pole, arrive at this well the side, and see the fox under the well, and then ask him the well water the how about it to drink?The fox feels the opportunity to e, heart inside
The 暗 pleaseds, right away the town quiet down, make every effort the laudation well water good drink, say this water is a world the first spring, pure and sweet and good to eat, and advise the goat to hurry up
Come down, and drink to heart's content with him。A the heart think only of to drink the water letter to think the true goat, then the without stopping to think ground jump downed to go to, and be his 咕咚咕 the 咚 painful
After finishing drinking, have to with the fox together totally the pany ascend the well's way。Fox early contain preparation, he to archly say:" I pour to have a
Method。You pick with forepaw on the well wall, again Cape 竖直 , I behind carry on the back to jump up the well to go to from you, and pull you again to e up, we all
Save。" the 公 goat agreed his proposal, fox to trample the feet of his empress, and jump he carry top on his back, and then make an effort from the Cape a
Jump, jump outed the mouth of a well。The fox go ups the hereafter, and the preparation alone escape。The 公 goat blames the fox and does not keep the 诺 speech。The fox returns overdo
Say to 公 goat:" hello, friend, beard that you of brains if resemble you are so perfect, you not to the extent of at did not see the pure exit it
Front blindly jump down to go to。"
This story elucidation, cleverness of the person should to in advance think it over the affair's result, then just go to do。
掉在井里的狐狸和公山羊
一只狐狸失足掉到了井里,不论他如何挣扎仍没法爬上去,只好呆在那里。公山羊觉得
口渴极了,来到这井边,看见狐狸在井下,便问他井水好不好喝?狐狸觉得机会来了,心中
暗喜,立刻镇静下来,极力赞美井水好喝,说这水是天下第一泉,清甜爽口,并劝山羊赶快
下来,与他痛饮。一心只想喝水信以为真的山羊,便不假思索地跳了下去,当他咕咚咕咚痛
饮完后,就不得不与狐狸一齐共商上井的办法。狐狸早有准备,他狡猾地说:“我倒有一个
方法 。你用前脚扒在井墙上,再把角竖直了,我从你后背跳上井去,再拉你上来,我们就都
得救了。”公山羊同意了他的提议,狐狸踩着他的后脚,跳到他背上,然后再从角上用力一
跳,跳出了井口。狐狸上去以后,准备独自逃离。公山羊指责狐狸不信守诺言。狐狸回过头
对公山羊说:“喂,朋友,你的头脑如果像你的胡须那样完美,你就不至于在没看清出口之
前就盲目地跳下去。”
这故事说明,聪明的人应当事先研究清楚事情的结果,然后才去做。
经典英语小故事(八):
The Ass and the Grasshopperan
Ass having heard some Grasshoppers chirping, was highly enchanted; and, desiring to possess the same charms of melody, demanded what sort of food they lived on, to give them such beautiful voices。 They replied, "The dew。" The Ass resolved that he would only live upon dew, and in a short time died of hunger。
驴和蚱蜢
一只驴听到几只蚱蜢在叫,便觉得很趣味;于是也想得到同样趣味的音调,便问蚱蜢吃什么东西过活,以致于能有这样优美的声音。蚱蜢说:「露水。」驴子听了,从此以后也单吃露水过活,不久便饿死了。
经典英语小故事(九):
Little boy and scorpion son
There is a child in front of city wall to catch the grasshopper, and in a short while caught the lots of。Suddenly see a scorpion son, he to think is also grasshopper,
Then two go to catch him。The scorpion son raises his poison to stab, say:" e, if you really dare to do like this, connect your grasshopper that catch to also would entirely lose。"
This story warns people, and want to distinguish the pure good man with the bad person, and distinct to treat them。
小男孩与蝎子
有个小孩在城墙前捉蚱蜢,一会儿就捉了许多。忽然看见一只蝎子,他以为也是蚱蜢,
便着两手去捕捉他。蝎子举起他的毒刺,说道:“来吧,如果你真敢这样做,就连你捉的蚱蜢也会统统失掉。”
这故事告诫人们,要分辨清好人和坏人,区别对待他们。
经典英语小故事(十):
The Wolf and the Lamba
Wolf, meeting with a Lamb astray from the fold, resolved not to lay violent hands on him, but to find some plea, which should justify to the Lamb himself his right to eat him。 He thus addressed him:"Sirrah, last year you grossly insulted me。" "Indeed," bleated the Lamb in a mournful tone of voice, "I was not then born。" Then said the Wolf, "You feed in my pasture。"
"No, good sir," replied the Lamb, "I have not yet tasted grass。" Again said the Wolf, "You drink of my well。" "No," exclaimed the Lamb, "I never yet drank water, for as yet my mother′s milk is both food and drink to me。" On which the Wolf seized him, and ate him up, saying, "Well! I won′t remain supperless, even though you refute every one of my imputations。"The tyrant will always find a pretext for his tyranny。
狼和小羊
一只狼瞧见一只迷路失群的小羊,决定暂缓下毒手,想先找一些理由,对小羊证明自我有吃它的权利。它就说:「小鬼!你去年以往骂过我。」小羊可怜地说:「老实说,我去年还没有出生呢。」狼再说:「你在我的草地上吃过草。」
小羊回答说:「不,好先生,我还未曾尝过草的味道呢。」狼又说:「你喝过我井里的水。」小羊叫道:「不,我从没有喝过水,因为直到今日为止,我都是吃着母亲的奶汁。」狼一听这话,便抓住它,把它吃下去,便说:「好!即使你驳倒我每一句话,我终究要吃晚餐的!」暴君总有他暴行的借口。
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