奇奇怪怪的lemon
英语话剧剧本推荐如下：
剧本名字The Bus。
A Story about Love and Stinky Feet。
（5-6人英语剧本，公交车上的故事，适合大学生活，关于爱和臭脚的故事。）
Female student A:,Female student B,Female student C,Boy A: Wang Chiang-rui
Boy B,Old woman。
Scene One：
Three female students are chatting on a bus. Because all the seats are taken, they are standing, holding onto some plastic rings hanging down from the bus roof. Two boys are sleeping in their seats.
Then the bus arrives at a stop and an old woman gets on. She looks at the seats. Seeing no empty seats, she stands next to a female student and holds onto a plastic ring.
Old woman: There're no empty seats. I guess I'll have to stand.
(The female students find the old woman not having a seat. They want to help her find one to sit in.)
Female student A: We should find a seat for her.
Female student B: Right. Those two bad boys did not give their seats to her.
(The two boys continue to sleep.)
Female student C: We should find a seat for her.
Female students A & B: Yes.
(Female student A goes to Boy A and taps on his shoulder.)
Female Student A: Excuse me, could you give your seat to that old lady?
(Boy A stretches and continues to sleep. Female students A and B look at each other. Female student B taps on Boy A's shoulder.)
Female Student B: Hey! Can you give your seat to that old lady?
Boy A: (wakes up) I lined up for twenty hours yesterday to buy A-Mei's new album. I'm very tired. I'm sorry I can't give my seat to the old lady. (continues to sleep)
Female student C: What should we do?
Female student B: Let's ask the other boy.
Boy B: (gets up suddenly) Ah!
All: (startled)Ah!
Female student B: What happened?
Female student C: Why did you scream?
Boy B: I had a nightmare. It was terrible.
Female student B: Excuse me, can you give your seat to that old lady?
(Boy B falls asleep.)
Female student A: Hello! Is it OK for you to make room for that old lady?
Boy B: Let me sleep, please. I read an English novel all night last night and didn't get any sleep. Can you let me sleep for a while?
Female student A: Well, we've tried.
Female student B: The young man is really brash.
Old woman: Thank you, young ladies! I'm OK! Don't think I'm an old woman. I am healthy. (makes a few kicks like a young man)
Female student C: Maybe we worry too much. The old lady's very healthy.
(The bus driver hits the brake suddenly and the old woman falls over. It makes Boy A wake up.)
Boy A: Oh! Are you OK?
Old woman: Oh! Oh! My waist!
Boy A: You can take my seat. (helps the old woman to the seat)
Female student C: Hmm. He just got his conscience.
Female student A: Yeah! I was just about to say they got no manners.
Female student B: Yeah. I thought he was a cold-blooded animal.
Boy A: Hey! Watch your own manners. I've given her my seat. I'm really very tired.
(At this time Boy B is embarrassed. He dares not continue to sleep.)
Old woman: Thank you, young man. I'm old and useless.
Boy B: Don't say that. If I'd given you my seat earlier, the accident wouldn't have happened.
(The bus driver hits the brake suddenly again. Boy A falls down.)
Scene Two：
(The Old woman and Boy B sit in the seats. Boy A is standing behind the three girls and drowsing. The three girls continue to chat. Boy A is drowsing carelessly and bumps into Female student A's body.)
Female student A: Oh! Who touched me? (turns her head around and sees
Boy A standing behind her) It's you, right?
Boy A: What?
Female student B: Why? You did it intentionally, didn't you?
Boy A: Wait. I didn't do anything.
Female student C: You touched her intentionally, right?
Boy A: Hey, I'm not that kind of person. (looks at Boy B) Hey… Is it you?
Boy B: (confused and shakes his head) Not me. I was sleeping.
(The bus driver hits the brake suddenly again. Boy A bumps into Female student A again.)
Female student A: (angry) Still saying it wasn't you? You pig!
Boy A: I didn't mean it.
Old woman: Nowadays boys are not the same as those in the past. Boys in the past were all very polite. Now boys are reckless.
Female student C: Now what do you have to say? Apologize to her. Hurry!
Boy A: Alright! Alright! (to female student A) I'm sorry.
(Female student A ignores him and continues to chat with the other two girls.)
Boy A: It's not my day today.
Boy B: Gentlemen don't fight with women. And she's no nice woman.
Old woman: Nowadays girls don't have good temper. Time really changed.
Boy B: Older people know more than us.
Old woman: When I was a young student, I got love letters from many men every day. For the sake of manners, I went out with different men every day.
(Boys A and B don't know what to say. Suddenly the bus driver hits the brake. The old woman bumps into Female student C's hips.)
Female student C: (surprised) You.....
(The old woman looks at Female student C and says nothing.)
Old woman: You have nice hips.
Female student B: I can't believe the old woman is capable of sexual harassment.
Female student C: Maybe nowadays old people are not the same as those in the past.
Female student A: Maybe after losing her husband, she feels lonely.
Female student B: Ah! Here we are. Let's get off.
Female student C: We'd better stay away from those strange people.
(Female students get off the bus.)
Boy B: Who are those strange people? They're real strange. (helps the old woman
up) Are you O.K.? Those young girls have no sympathy.
Old woman: (feels Boy B's hand) You also have a pair of very fine hands.
Boy B: (startled) What?
Boy A: This old woman is also very strange.
Boy B: Let's go!
Old woman: Don't be shy, young man. I have held such kind of hand for a long time.
(Boy B frees himself from the old woman's hand and gets off.)
Old woman: (looks at Boy A) You're nice, too.
Boy A: Hmm, good-bye. (gets off)
铭钔釺唫
在一个阳光明媚的清晨，灰太狼在摩尔城堡抓青蛙回去给老婆吃。Pleasant goat and grey wolf " " mole drama script in a sunny morning, grey wolf in the castle to catch the frog back to eat his wife.灰太狼：青蛙！青蛙！你别跑！我抓到你的！Grey Wolf: frog! Frog. Don't you run! I gotcha.灰太狼看见一群小羊在城堡露台上玩Grey wolf saw a group of sheep in the castle terrace to play灰太狼：嘿嘿，今晚要改菜单了......Grey Wolf: Hey, tonight will change the menu ... ..在狼堡.....The Wolf fort ....红太狼：青蛙呢？Wolf: the frog?灰太狼：老婆，我看到小羊了，这次我一定抓到小羊Grey Wolf: wife, I saw a lamb, this time I must catch the lamb红太狼：嗯，我就再信你一次这次一定要抓羊Red: Well, I'll trust you again this time to catch the sheep灰太狼：老婆，我发明了溜溜鞋走路比常人快一倍！Grey Wolf: wife, I invented yo-yo shoes to walk faster than average one times!红太狼：抓不到羊就别回来Red Wolf: catch the sheep do not come back在羊村......In the sheep village ... ..喜羊羊：今天天气真好，大家快来玩吧！Pleasant goat: the weather is nice today, we quickly come to play!美羊羊、懒羊羊、费羊羊：好呀！The beautiful sheep sheep, sheep, for sheep: ah!喜羊羊：玩什么呢？Pleasant goat: play what?美羊羊：抓迷藏吧The beautiful sheep sheep: hide and seek懒羊羊：睡觉、吃零食A lazy sheep sheep: sleep, eat snacks沸羊羊：我无所谓....Sturdy sheep: I don't care ....喜羊羊：玩抓迷藏吧Pleasant goat: a game of hide and seek.懒羊羊：我找个地方睡觉去A lazy sheep sheep: I find a place to sleep灰太狼：亲爱的小肥羊本大王来啦Grey Wolf: dear little sheep and the king.懒羊羊：ZzzzzzLazy: Zzzzzzzz灰太狼：小肥羊们你们好！Grey Wolf: little sheep are you good!喜羊羊：灰太狼来了快逃！！！Grey Wolf: pleasant goat to flee!!!美羊羊：救命！The beautiful sheep sheep : help!灰太狼：抓住美羊羊啦Grey Wolf: catch the beautiful sheep sheep沸羊羊：美羊羊我来救你！Sturdy sheep: pretty I came to help you!灰太狼：不自量力Grey Wolf: too big for her skin沸羊羊：救命喜羊羊Pleasant goat goat : help灰太狼：跟我回家吧Grey Wolf: come home with me.在狼堡........The Wolf fort ....灰太狼：老婆羊来了Grey Wolf: wife of sheep.红太狼：快烧水煮羊Red Wolf: fast firing boiled sheep沸羊羊：救命~Sturdy sheep: help ~喜羊羊：沸羊羊！美羊羊！Pleasant goat：Sturdy sheep！The beautiful sheep sheep美羊羊：喜羊羊救我The beautiful sheep sheep: Pleasant Goat and save me喜羊羊：恩，我来解开绳子Pleasant goat: Well, I come to untie the rope喜羊羊像狼堡扔了个炸弹就和美羊羊和沸羊羊走了Pleasant goat like the Wolf fort threw a bomb on the beautiful sheep sheep and goat go灰太狼、红太狼：我们一定会回来的！！！
白色犬犬
《 荆珂刺秦王》旁白(Aside )/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman剑客 and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众） I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister?阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate?阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK?阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲Are you Li mochou?李莫愁Yes.荆轲OK. I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁Are you challenging me?荆轲Off course! 耸耸肩表示同意李莫愁Come on!音乐起两人冲上前来“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。。。。”李莫愁倒地荆轲大笑李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person. Don't we? Do we? （赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）李莫愁：Momma always said: "Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou. You never know what you're gonna get." I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you?太子丹：Oh my God! Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”?荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you?荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife?太子丹晕倒荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please?荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now! 太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card?荆柯：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look! She is the most beautiful girl in the world. If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?荆柯; Hey, guy! You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer.阿三：Excuse me? What’s the TCM?观众甲：TCM - Traditional Chinese MM .太子丹：I must show you the trump card. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea. It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荆柯（激动）：Slimming减食疗法 tea! I have dreamed of it for thousands of times. My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？难道你真的想要吗……荆柯(诚恳状) Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）荆珂挽着妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please. Farewell, my friends太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。停顿。《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose在船头的经典造型，忽然荆轲看到一个美女——此时一个中国古典美女经过，向荆轲抛媚眼，并抛下定情手绢。荆轲高兴的盯着美女看，妻子发觉不对，扭过头来。）荆珂（急忙收敛）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you! You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪) ：I love you more. In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you. (哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well. Be a man, just do it! I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart! You must do me this honor... promise me you will survive... that you will never give up... no matter what happens... no matter how hopeless... promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:"I promise."荆轲:"Never let go. “妻子:"I promise. I will never let go, Jack. I'll never let go."（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。）妻子努力挤出几滴眼泪，荆珂上船，渐渐远去妻子：It’s a good day to die. Never come back. Never…… Never……妻子(掏出手机拨号，阿三接手机)： Thank you very much. As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account.阿三：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng. 结束！
